


Confession (L.S.)

by Lonely_Larry_Kitten



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Baby Harry, Bottom Harry, Caregiver Louis, DDLG, Daddy Louis, Dummy - Freeform, Little Harry, M/M, Multi, Top Louis, cgl, ddlb, femharry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-10
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-03-29 15:56:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 24,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13930383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lonely_Larry_Kitten/pseuds/Lonely_Larry_Kitten
Summary: "Promise not to judge me?""Of course.""You say that now, but...""But what?""...You'll see."***Harry Styles is, an all ways, a smol bean. Well, as smol as a nearly six foot teen can be. He's a sophomore who's best (and only) friends are two juniors who tend to "treat him differently". He's become so accustom to such treatment that he soon sees it become part of his everyday life.Louis Tomlinson is an asshole. He's a junior who bullies just for the fun of it. He begins targeting Harry and soon learns some rather shocking things...ORThe one where green and blue are a little reluctant but are brought together by something much bigger than them.





	1. Warnings

I do not own any members of One Direction and do not condone any acts of abuse of any sort. This story is completely different compared to what it originally was and I'm glad.

May include (but not limited to):  
• DDLB  
• BoyxBot  
• Profanity  
• Verbal Bullying  
• Homophobic Slurs  
• Mentions of Substance Use  
• Use Of Alcohol  
• etc.

As you go along, some parts may vary from others due to the fact that I am revising the entire plot to make it less harsh and more fluent in its whole. Thank you for reading.

Sincerely,

Kitten. ❤️❤️


	2. Chapter One: Blue Meets Green

High school sucks.

No one wants to bullied and here I am, living the life of a victim that no one ever wants to have to go through. I sighed as I finished gathering my supplies from my locker. It wasn't as if I were a nerd or anything, not that there's anything wrong with being one, of course; it's simply the fact that I do indeed have honors courses and can maintain at least a high B, if not a low A.

I locked my locker up and began cautiously walking down the halls. Although I had ten minutes to get to class, there was no reason for me to meander about the school. My two best friends, Niall and Zayn, we're both a year ahead of me: juniors. So I didn't get to spend much time in school with them. As I was walking with my head low to avoid eye contact, someone purposely bumped into my shoulder hard, causing my books and assignment papers to fall to the floor. I looked up and met the cruelest man I'd ever met.

Louis Tomlinson. Everybody feared him and everybody had a reason to. The junior would hurt anything that walked on two legs and disagreed with any of his opinions. He once punched a boy in the face for saying that burgers were better than pizzas. I mean, don't get me wrong, I like pizza as much as the next guy, but I wouldn't  _punch somebody in the face_ for not liking pizza.

Louis' blue eyes glared at me abrasively as I tried my best to look away. I was a blushing mess, all of my books and assignments in the space between us. Louis huffed.

"Watch where you're going, y'twat," he seethed. I lowered my eyes and started to recollect my items silently, muttering an apology and praying that he'd be gone as soon as I stood up. Unfortunately, he stood there haughtily, smirking deviously at me as if he knew something I didn't. I quirked an eyebrow at him in confusion, growing more and more antsy with every passing second I spent standing there.

"Well," he began, "are you just gonna stand there all day?" I furrowed my eyebrows in disarray.  _Was this a joke? A test of some sort?_

A group of students started accumulating as it grew to be five minutes before the late bell would ring. I couldn't be late; I'd never been late. In my two years of high school so far, I'd had perfect attendance.

"Can you just leave me alone, please?" I sighed, nervously running a hand through my long hair and blushing. Immediately, his stance turned lethal.

"What did you just say to me?" he questioned me with a look of pure brutality in his eyes. My eyes widen as I'd realized I'd made a grave mistake.

"I, uh, I didn't mean to say that, I— just—" I was interrupted by the sound of the bell music playing, indicating that we had three minutes before the late bell. It was now or never.

I glanced at Louis who had seemed momentarily distracted by the sudden music and made a run for it.

 ** _"Hey!!"_**  I heard Louis' shoes hit the ground running as he chased me. I didn't dare look back, too fearful for my life and instead focused on making it to class on time. I smiled as I stepped foot into the first class of the day just as the late bell rang.

I looked behind me with a grin. It altered as I caught Tomlinson's gaze boring into my skull, his chest heaving with every pant he exhaled. He maintained eye contact for a split second and, when I blinked, he was gone.

***  
Before I knew it, fifth period had ended and all my fellow meat sacks and I piled into the halls. I bid a good day to my fifth period teacher, who was actually an old family friend, and went against the crowd of brainless zombies. I was gonna link up with my mates and give them all the gossip about this morning before they could hear any different from the nosy people who stood around watching instead of providing any assistance.

Once I'd found their classroom, I let myself in, their teacher not even throwing a glance my way. I found the two in the back of their chemistry class, properly disposing the liquids from a previous lab. I made my way over to them and hugged Niall from behind, seeing as he had no potentially harmful substances in his grasp. He didn't even flinch or turn around as I snuggled my face into the crook of his neck.

"Hey, Harry," Niall greeted softly. I hummed in acknowledgement. A few moments later I felt Zayn hug me from behind, humming into my hair. I giggled as he placed a kiss on my head.

"Hey, mate," he greeted me.

See, Ziall and I (it's easier to say than Zayn and Niall, so I gave them a cute lil' nickname) had a peculiar relationship: they treated me like their baby. To them, I'm their literal child. Do I mind? Nope, not one bit.

I gave them my biggest grin. When I was with them, I was ten times quieter, but that's only because they understood me in a way in which I didn't have to voice most of my requests and all.

Zayn looked around to make sure the classroom was empty. Once he was assured that everyone had cleared out, he took away my books, passing them to Niall who put his backpack on (he didn't believe in lockers) and held my books for me. Zayn picked me up and placed me on his hip. I squealed at the familiar sensation of being lifted.

I remember the first time they'd shown any interest in treating me in such a way. I thought I'd be against it but they put me on a one week trial to let them treat me as they pleased and it ended up being the most trusting experience ever, and I don't only mean learning to trust them. I had to trust myself to trust others and they taught me to do that.

"How was your day so far, huh, bubba?" Zayn cooed at me. I blushed, preening under the attention he provided me with. I felt my headspace go blurry for a second.

Oh, experiencing slips and such— Well, that's a story for another time, I suppose.

I pouted and shook my head as I replayed this morning's odd occurrence. Zayn frowned and turned to Niall.

"Not a good morning we have, here," he spoke as if I weren't here. Niall creased his eyebrows and looked to me.

"What happened, princess?" I sighed, a bit reluctant to speak yet excited to explain. Zayn set me on one of the lab tables.

"Well, this morning I—"

"Can you guys leave, please?" the chemistry teacher spoke up. "You guys are here every day after class and, although I don't mind, it does run into my lunchtime."

Niall was ready to open his mouth and fight her but Zayn, being the more levelheaded of the two, placed a hand over his mouth and smiled at the teacher.

"Thank you for your honesty. We'll be on our way now, thanks," he excused us in a polite, apologetic manner. Niall sighed but followed Zayn out of the classroom with a mere roll of his eyes.

Once we were outside the classroom, Zayn put me down, much to my displeasure. Niall immediately wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me to his side.

"We're gonna go to our spot and then you can tell us about your day, yeah, babe?" Niall spoke. I nodded and followed them down the stairs and through the crowd of meatheads.

We finally made it to our spot outside. It was perfect: a nice tree shielding us from the merciless rays of the sun and a fine line between the shady and the sunny spots. Niall always provided us with food and Zayn always brought a blanket for all of us to sit on. I didn't have to do anything; in fact, I was encouraged to do nothing.

I stood there as they set up and shortly afterwards, Zayn swept me up bridal style and gently laid me down. Niall opened his backpack and got out my blanket and pillow while Zayn dished out food for us.

"Today, we've brought your favorite, darling: tacos!!" Niall gushed as he tickled me. I squirmed and giggled as Zayn began silently splitting an Arizona Tea between himself and Niall. I always got a Caprisun. As soon as the food was evenly divided and everyone began eating, Zayn prompted me into telling the story of what went down this morning. I explained it the best I could.

"I mean, I think he was just trying to make me feel uncomfortable or summat," I ended, shrugging into another bite of my second taco. Niall sighed and shook his head.

"He's a big meanie, ain't he?" Zayn fumed. There's a big 'no cursing' thing that goes on between us too, purely because I went to a private middle school and started public high school not knowing a word of curses. It's supposed to keep me pure and, in a way, I guess it did; I don't curse.

I pouted and nodded, Niall taking my plate out of my hands and proceeding to feed me the rest of my food. Some people might call it overbearing, I call it friendship. Soon, while I was playing patty cake with Niall (Zayn was taking photos), the bell rang signaling the end of lunch. Ziall cleaned up and escorted me to class, then they were to be unheard of until the end of the day.

***  
When the end of the day rolled around, I was genuinely exhausted. Sure, I only had two classes after lunch, one being choir, but those two classes wore me down. I trudged out of choir and to my locker, eyes downcast and avoiding bumping into anyone. I safely reached my locker and began unlocking it, stuffing all my materials in it and taking out only my homework that I'd accumulated throughout the day. I packed up my locker and turned around, only to be faced with Louis Tomlinson. In the flesh.

"Uh—hi, um, I'm sorry about—"

Before I could utter another sound, Louis had me pressed against the locker, his face closed in on mine.

"Let's get one thing straight, pretty boy," he seethed, "you will never,  _never_ treat me how you treated me this morning. Agreed?" I nodded. "Good. 'Cause if you pull that sh—"

"Oh my god, Harry is that you?!" My heart practically jumped out of my chest at the sound of Niall's voice. I glanced over Louis' shoulder to see him practically sprinting over before looking back to Louis.

He stared at me for a full minute before letting go and storming off without another word. Before I could even catch my breath,  Niall came barreling over, wrapping his arms around me protectively while Zayn trailed behind, glaring at Louis' exiting figure. Niall brought my head to his chest.

"Oh my goodness, baby, are you all right?" he fretted, pushing me back at arms-length so he could check for injuries. I nodded, a bit dazed and my head still reeling after all that just occurred mere moments ago.

"We're taking you to our place. I'll text your mum," Zayn arranged. Niall nodded in agreement.

"Zayn, can you watch him while I pull up the car?" Zayn nodded and came over to us, hugging me to his side and placing a quick peck to the top of my head. Niall place a kiss to my cheek and fled to go grab Zayn's car. Of course, Niall had one but Zayn insists on driving us all to and from school.

"Are you sure you're fine? You look like you're gonna be sick any second, now," Zayn joked. I cracked a small smile and shrugged the feeling of shock and fear away. I knew Ziall wouldn't let anything happen to me.  _I'm their baby, they'll protect me._

Niall pulled up in front of us and hopped out the driver's seat. Wordlessly, they sat me in the back seat, the one with the booster seat, and Niall sat in the passenger's side, Zayn always taking driver's side. Niall even customized his little area.

Niall strapped me in before taking his seat. Although Zayn's car wasn't really properly equipped for a kid, we made due. Niall bought one of those mini TVs to keep me occupied during long rides and Zayn bought a pair of headphones for me to listen to it in the mornings.

Zayn and Niall are an unstoppable team. Sometimes they seem more like an old married couple than a high school couple. Speaking of their relationship, it's intriguing. They have confessed their attraction for one another and have established that their in a relationship. The thing is, they're both poly, so they have agreed on an open relationship. They haven't found anyone they both were interested in yet, but they're both fine with just each other. I, on the other hand, am still single and lonely. So that's going great.

In no time, we pulled into Ziall's flat. Zayn parked the car and came back to unstrap me and carry me inside. Niall grabbed his and Zayn's backpacks and brought those inside. Once we were all inside, Niall set the backpacks on the couch and Zayn passed me off to him. I hummed happily, having a sudden rush of happiness course through me, as he brought me up two flights of carpeted stairs and into a cute, little, "big baby" nursery.

Niall plopped me down on the changing table and left to grab me a onesie and a pull-up. I was unfazed, used to this sort of treatment for months on end. It seems unlikely, but there was a time when they were even more obsessed with me being their baby. Niall came back and got me all strapped up on the changing table.

Niall plopped a dummy past my lips and I immediately began sucking on the soothing rubber. Niall cooed at me and proceeded to give me an Eskimo-kiss, making me crinkle my nose. He let out a hearty laugh and shook his head.

"Guess what I've got today, peaches!" Niall practically squealed before holding up a onesie.

I giggled behind my dummy and began squirming about happily. Niall clapped his hands together lightly.

"Somebody's happy," he stayed cheerfully. He began stripping me down to my birthday suit and gently pulled a pull-up over my shaven legs, quickly covering up my private parts. It was comfortably silent as he dressed me and brought me back down to Zayn, placing me directly on his lap. Zayn sounded an over-exaggerated gasp.

"And who is this little boy?" he asked in a mock shocked manner. I giggled and hid my face in the crook of his neck, feeling my headspace go foggy again due to all the attention they were practically bathing me in.

"Wanna watch a movie, bubba?" Zayn proposed. I nosed his neck and hummed in agreement. "How about I put on some Frozen, yeah?" Without waiting for me to reply, Zayn left me with Niall to go grab the movie and pop some popcorn for all of us.

That night, I fell asleep cuddled up with my two best friends and the last few lines of Frozen playing in the background.


	3. Chapter Two: Don't Wander Too Far, Little One

I woke up in my crib, my face stuffed into my big teddy. I sighed sleepily and made no move to get up. Until I felt my nappy. I had apparently soaked it overnight and it became unbearably uncomfortable. I began to whine and squirm, my dummy falling out of my mouth.

"Ni!" I drawled our in discomfort. I grew to the point of completely feeling overwhelmed and began to cry. I immediately heard Niall's footsteps pitter patter down the carpeted halls. In t minus five seconds, Niall was in my room, picking me up and rocking me side to side.

"Shh," he hushed, "I'm here. I'm right here." I soon calmed down, focusing on Niall's heartbeat to distract myself from the wet nappy.

"Now, what's wrong, princess? You need a nappy change?" I nodded against his chest, bringing my thumb to my mouth. Niall tsked and swatted my hand away gently.

"Too many germies on your fingie, baby," he reprimanded, "What about a dummy?" he offered, pulling one out of the front pocket of his sweats. I nodded vehemently, mouthing at his hairy nipple. Niall giggled and popped the dummy in my mouth.

"You're a wild child," he laughed as he brought me to the changing table. "So, Zee's downstairs starting on breakfast, yeah? That means we're gonna give you a quick bath and getcha bibbed up for food!" He spoke animatedly, throwing his hands up and exciting me.

Niall placed me on his hip, bringing me to the bathroom and setting me on the toilet. He proceeded to set the bath, looking under the sink for the special bubbly I insisted we use every time they were to bathe me. I watch as he put the soap in the water, mesmerized as bubbles began to form.

Niall made sure to keep the bath quick. I let him wash me, unabashed by him seeing me bare naked. At the end of the bath, when he'd brung up the drainer and grabbed the towel off the towel rack above the toilet, I brought my hands up above my head, begging him to pick me up with my eyes. He rolled his eyes fondly but bent down to pick me up anyways. Ni quickly dressed me in a cute onesie, letting me go commando since I couldn't decide whether or not if I wanted to try the diaper or stick to my undies.

Speaking of, Zayn and Niall has recently got me into exploring the more feminine side of myself and I'd found my interest in feminine clothing piqued beyond a whole 'nother level. It first started out with a few sheer, floral tops:

Then I found myself in some sheer pink shirt:

And, behind Ziall's back (when I'm in a normal headspace, that is), I turned to more  _intimate_ clothing:

Of course, I wore most of these things outside of school. Surprisingly, my mum had no issue with it. In fact, she encouraged it as soon as I found interest in it. I remember just bawling in her arms, babbling about how happy and relieved I was that she was okay with it.

Once I was fully clothed, I was once again set on Niall's hip and brought to the kitchen where Zayn was, standing at the stove and flipping some bacon on their other side on the griddle. Niall hummed as he walked past him, placing a quick peck to his right shoulder blade and proceeding to take me to the dining table. I was sat in my adult-sized high chair, unconsciously kicking my legs up every now and then.

I sat patiently, waiting for breakfast and amusing myself with Niall's fingers. As I was tweaking them every which way, Zayn served up plates of breakfast. Zayn places a kiss to the top of my head as he reached over to set Niall's plate on the table. I giggled and shook my hair out, scrunching my face up playfully.

"How ya feelin' this morning, sunshine?" He asked, ruffling my hair before sitting across from Ni. I shrugged tiredly, letting out a little yawn. Niall cooed and began breaking up my food on my plate. He began spoon feeding me scrambled eggs, striking up a conversation with Zaynie.

"So, what're the plans for today?" Zayn thought for a little bit.

"I'm thinking we take this little bugger—" he paused, turning to tickle me a bit. "—to the mall and do a little shopping. What'd you think?" Niall nodded slowly, engulfed in his food and feeding me off of his plate.

"For the time being, I think we should just chill a bit, maybe pull out some homework so that when we leave, he's not still floating," Ni concurred. Zayn hummed and bobbed his head, pointing a fork towards him to signal his agreement.

I minded my business, noting that by "floating" they were speaking in terms of my headspace. It's truly miraculous how I found such caring friends.

***

"Harry! Are you ready?"

"Yeah! Just give me a minute!" I hollered back to Niall as I hopped around on one foot, tugging a boot on my foot. I groaned as I tumbled over, sighing in slight defeat and frustration.

After breakfast, they let me remain in headspace for an hour before we spent another two hours pulling me out of headspace and completing all of our homework. Now, we were getting ready to head to the mall, Zee starting the car up for us. I settled for a baby blue shirt, picking from the guest room that I'd basically moved into when they'd first bought the house together. I paired the blouse-like top with a pair of skinnies and boots, completing the look I was going for.

After I'd finally composed myself, I quickly made my way to the door, where Niall analyzed my outfit, giving me a hum of approval, showing that he'd found the outfit satisfactory. I smiled, sighing contently as we ventured to the car. Instead of sitting in my car seat, I sat in the seat across from it, buckling my seatbelt as Zayn pulled out of the driveway.

I scrolled through my phone as Nialler adjusted the radio, setting it to some song by Justin Bieber. He squealed, turning up the volume and singing along. Zayn glanced over to him, snorting softly before turning his eyes back to the road and shaking his head fondly. I took some aesthetic photos of the trees we'd passed, uploading them to my Instagram page.

After a while, I set my phone aside, placing my head against the cold glass of the window, squinting against the powerful rays of the sun. I saw the mall come into view after a few minutes. I stretched my body and grabbed my phone, preparing myself to exit the car as Zee turned into the parking lot. Niall turned down the music, assembling his own small trinkets and helping Zayn find a good parking spot.

Once we'd all gotten out of the car and shut the doors behind us, Niall locked the car and both men grabbed one of my hands instinctively as we crossed the road and entered the mall. They never let go of my hands and I didn't mind; better safe than sorry. Plus, I'd always been one to roam and wander.

"How about here?" Zayn proposed, pointing to Adidas. I 'ooh'-ed, interested in checking out their crop tops and track suits for the occasional morning runs I'd take when I woke up in my regular mind setting. I nodded enthusiastically and Niall muttered a quick but cheerful 'yeah'. Zayn practically dragged us into the store before freeing my hand and turning to face me.

"Don't wander too far around the store, yeah?" I smiled and playfully saluted him.

"You have my word!" I exclaimed brightly as I skipped over to the rack of crop tops.

I let my fingers skim over the various colors of the shirts, finding myself amazed by the softness of them. I couldn't just take  _one_ , but then I remembered how broke I was, then stopped mentally complaining.

As I scanned the racks for deals and clearances, I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"I haven't moved," I muttered as I lifted one of the black crop tops up, analyzing it. "Should I get thi—"

When I'd turned around, I found myself shocked to find out that it was neither Zayn or Niall behind me.

It was Louis.

"You like crop tops?" he questioned bluntly. I felt heat rush to my cheeks as my gazed turned to meet the ground, mentally begging it to open up and swallow me whole on the spot.

"I, uh, well—you see—" I found myself at a loss for words as I struggled to put the crop top back on the rack. I cleared my throat once I'd finally managed to do so, patting the imaginary dust off my skinny jeans, flustered. Louis raised an eyebrow in a bored manner, crossing his arms across his chest.

"So?" he prompted, "are you gonna answer my question?" I sighed in defeat, throwing my hands up in exasperation.

"I don't know what you want me to say. While we're here, I'd like to apologize about yesterday," I began rambling, "I didn't mean to offend you but I've just never been late to a class before and I—"

"I don't care and that's  _not_ what I ask," Louis snapped l, obviously not baited by my attempts to divert the conversation away from my current activity.

"Okay, I—"

"Harry??" I turned around quickly at the sound of my name. My eyes widened and I fiddled with my fingers nervously.

"Niall."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to inform you guys that updates might be a little slow due to the fact that I'm still developing the plot and doing a lot of backspacing on the previous typed up shiz. Also, I'm trying to make these as detailed and lengthy as possible for all you lovely people. ❤️❤️❤️
> 
> P. S., I love yoooouuuuuu xx


	4. Chapter Three: Secrecy, Part I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back, what's good.

_"Niall."_

Niall looked to Louis with a glare, stepping to my side and wrapping an arm around me defensively. Louis leveled his glare with a lax look of boredom. Louis raised an eyebrow at him, waiting for him to begin talking.

"Why are  _you_ here?" Niall sneered in sheer repugnance. Louis grinned cockily.

"Just engaging in a  _lovely_ conversation with young Harold over here," he responded in a sickeningly sweet manner. Niall's glare seemed to sharpen, something I didn't think was possible at that moment in time. He turned his gaze to me, melting into a pile of concern.

"Are you okay? He didn't hurt you, did he?" Niall fretted, scanning my being for any sight of damage. I gave him a small, close-mouthed smile.

"I'm fine, papa," I whispered to him. He sighed and looked me in the eye, nodding as of to assure himself.

"Yeah," he muttered, "you're fine. You're alright. You know I just... _worry,_ sometimes." He let out a short chuckle. I rolled my eyes fondly. Louis cleared his throat, causing us both to look in his direction.

"See? Everything's fine. You can leave," Louis deadpanned. Niall sighed once more before giving my shoulder and wandering off to find Zayn. After he left, I turned back to Louis awkwardly, unsure of what to say and why he was here.

"Well, I'm just gonna..." I let the fragment hang in the air as I began to walk away, feeling way out of my element; social interactions that excluded Zayn and Niall were not my forte. Louis nodded dismissively and turned on his heel, proceeding to make his way out of the shop. I shook my head as I watched his figure retreat.

"What an odd guy," I muttered before turning to the racks of crop tops. I gave them a long stare before shaking my head. I didn't need to show so much skin.  _I could never pull it off._

I wandered around the store and checked my phone. I sent out a text to the group chat titled "CG's and Baby" (courtesy of Niall) which consisted of, yep, you guessed it: Niall, Zayn, and I.

**Can I go to another store, pretty plz?**

I waited for a response. I looked around to see if I could spot them but failed to.

**R u still w/Louis?**

I shook my head as I read over Niall's text.

**No.**

I stared at the small screen of my phone, awaiting a response from either of the two. I finally got one a few moments later.

**Don't wander off too far. Txt us when you go too far/switch stores. Keep us posted. Xx**

I smiled and squealed excitedly as I finished reading Zayn's text message. I quickly pocketed my phone and practically sprinted out of the shop, in search of a more exciting store.

I stood outside the store that I was previously I with Niall and Zayn, scanning the vast mall from my little area not too far away from the safe, comforting arms of my protectors.  _Where to, next?_

***

After a good while spent window shopping, Ziall and I agreed that it was time to meet up at the food court. I stood in plain sight, making sure I was visible to them as I scanned the vast court for the two lovers.

I finally spotted them conversing with a man about their age. I slowly made my way over to them, deciding whether or not to butt in on their conversation. Once I'd gotten to a noticeable proximity, Niall shouted my name and called me over with a bright smile on his face.

"Hi hi," I mumbled as I stood in between Niall and Zayn. The man with brown hair and brown, puppy eyes raised an eyebrow at curiously.

"And who might this by?" He questioned with a warm smile. Zayn places a hand on my lower back.

"This is Harry, a friend of ours," he introduced, causing me to blush from all the attention. "He's also our baby we were talk about earlier." I furrowed my eyebrows.  _They were talking about me?_

"Oh! Well, in that case, it's a pleasure to meet you, Harry!" The man gently gathered me in his arms and I hesitantly hugged him back. "I'm Liam, and I—"

" **LIAM!!"**

We all turned around to see Louis practically sprinting to Liam's side with a cheerful smile.

"Hey, mate what's got ya busy— _oh."_

Niall and Zayn took a protective step towards me and Louis just looked back to Liam.

"Li, let's go," he deadpanned to Liam. Liam's blithe countenance morphed into an expression of puzzlement.

"But why ca—"

" _Let's go,"_ Louis growled. Liam sighed and faced us with a sad smile.

"Well, looks like I have to go," he began, pulling out his phone. "But maybe I could grab your numbers and we can hang out sometime ? And I'm always happy to babysit, if needed," he rambled as Zayn and Niall embedded their numbers into his contacts list.

Zayn slung his arm over my shoulder as Niall wrapped his hand around my waist, smiles on their faces as they payed all their attention to Liam. I kept my eyes on Louis, who leveled my curious stare with one of his own.

"We'd love that, wouldn't we, Haz?" I whipped my head around and raised my eyebrows as I heard Zayn call my name. I blushed once I noticed everyone's attention was keyed in on me.

"Uh, y-yeah," I chuckled awkwardly, mentally face palming myself. Niall squeezes my side reassuring me as I heard Zayn's playful laughter erupt from his chest. That's when I grew a bit fuzzy in terms of headspace. I squeezed Niall's upper arm, leaning over to whisper to him.

"Can we go bye bye?" I whispered as a surge of childish giddiness swept threw me, throwing me into a fit of quieted giggles.

Niall looked to Zayn and Liam who were chitchatting with one another casually, it seemed, as if they'd gone way back. Ni rapped on Zee's shoulder.

"Hey, we gotta get Hazzie home," he stated as I leaned into his side, laying my head on his shoulder. Ziall exchanged a few glances before it dawned upon Zayn what was happening. His mouth formed a nearly perfect 'O' and he turned to Liam.

"We need to get this little bugger home, Li. He's, uh,  _slipping,_ " Zayn phrased, eyeing Louis cautiously. Liam got the gist and nodded quickly.   
            
"No, no! Of course!" he pardoned, "I'll text you both later on tonight. See you around!" he hollered over his shoulder as Louis dragged him away. Zayn and Niall turned to me with smiles.

"Let's get ya home, buttercup."


	5. Chapter Four: Secrecy, Part II

** Liam's POV **

I stumbled over my feet as Louis dragged me along, heading for the mall exit.

"Louis, what the fuck!" I hissed as I found balance and tugged my hand out of his grasp. I stopped in my tracks as he turned around to face me with the hardest glare. 

"Why were you talking to them?" He questioned abruptly. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion before I composed myself and answered him.

"Well, Zayn bumped into me and started flirting and, ya know, he was hot." I blushed as I fumbled over my words but continued explaining myself. "So, we're talking and this blue-eyed boy comes over and kisses Zayn on the cheek. At first I was very angry because this man had a boyfriend and was  _flirting_ with me! Then he explained that they were in this open relationship and I was interested in them both, so--"

"Okay, that's cool and all, but why was the curly one there? Is he in their relationship, too? Are you trying to get in his pants, too?" I saw Louis' face begin to turn red and, for a minute, I feared for my life.

"No, no! He's their-well, it's complicated, really. But he's not in a relationship with them," I responded vaguely, not too sure that Louis would react well to what Zayn and Niall were talking me through earlier. He grumbled.

"Why don't you just  _tell me_!" Lou huffed. I looked around the mall to make sure we weren't causing a scene. I sighed.

"It's not my place to tell," I excused, "I'm sorry, mate." I gave Louis an apologetic shrug and trailed behind him as he groaned and left the mall. 

 

**Harry's POV**

I giggled as Niall made funny faces above me. I was in my crib, my teddy bear, Mr. Snugglesworth, tucked under my right arm. We were in my baby room, Zayn in the kitchen making dinner. Nini said what he was making was a surprise.

"What'd ya wanna do next, huh, babe? How about a bath!" Niall suggested. I wrinkled my nose in distaste. He chuckled. "Okay, how about...oh! How about we watch a movie!" My focus was short-lived as my eyes caught sight of my rattle, which sat next to me. I hummed and turned to Niall. 

"Wan' rara," I requested, motioning my head to my rattle. Ni immediately knew what I wanted, taking the rattle in hand and shaking it a bit. It excited me, making me reach out for it. 

Niall sat me up so I could properly play with my rattle. I remembered the first day they brought it home. I was particularly fussy that day; I was practically insatiable. They'd basically everything in the textbook: diaper changing, feeding me, burping me, try to put me to sleep, etc. Of course, all of their ideas failed. Zayn got so frustrated that day that he stepped out for a good half an hour, which made things worst because I needed both of them at the time. 

When Zayn did come back, though, he came bearing a gift. The rattle was a simple soothing method that his family used when he was younger, he said. Niall tentatively handed it over to me, just to vouch my reaction. Surprisingly, I was captivated enough to shut up. That had them silently cheering. I eventually grew tired of the rattle, throwing it over the high side of the crib. I let out a short laugh as I heard it clash to the ground. 

"Oh, Harry!" Niall grumbled as he bent to pick up the rattle. He placed it in my bassinet (which was only used when I was in a newborn headspace) and sighed. "Zaynie must be done with dinner by now, yeah?" He asked rhetorically as he picked me up, holding me to his chest, my chin propped on his shoulder. Niall hoisted me a bit higher on his front side and began making his way to the kitchen. 

It was kind of funny how Ziall kind of had unspoken positions: Niall was more of the nurturing mother type and Zayn was the providing father (in a stereotypical sense, that is). They were the type of parents I wish I'd grown up with. 

My mother, although we're working harder at a closer bond, used to deeply abhor me. Of course, she'd deny it, saying that she didn't know what she was thinking.  _Yeah, for_ ** _eight years_. ** She had previously been married to this inconsiderate prick that had basically ruined her picture-perfect life. Mum was great before him, but then, in come's Desmond Styles, with his snakelike charm and empty promises of an even better life for my mum. 

She had us and, when I was around eight, I believe, things started going downhill; Des started drinking and picking up a few "harmless narcotics". At that time and age, I didn't know what that was or why it had Mum sleeping on the couch or crying when she thought she was alone. Eventually, she found herself going down the same path as Des. She stopped fighting with him and decided to join him instead. 

Gemma, my sister, and I can never forgive them for the treacherous things they put us through during that time, but one thing will always remain: I learned to fear my mother.  So having Niall and Zayn step in after years of torment gave me the opportunity to live the childhood that was stripped away from me at such an early time in my development. 

"There's my two favorite people in the whole wide world!" I heard Zayn exclaim melodramatically as Niall and I stepped foot into the kitchen. I giggled into Niall's shoulder, turning to hide my face in the crook of his neck. Zayn tickled my sides, causing me to gasp out in laughter and wriggle in Niall's grasp. 

"Come here, big boy!" Zayn lifted me up and in his arms."Guess what I made tonight." I hummed, a fond smile spreading on my face. 

"It's your favorite, bubba! Tacos!!" Niall practically shouted. 

"Yay!!" I hollered, clapping my hands together in excitement. 

 

I was settled into my highchair, Niall sitting on my right (close enough to feed me) and Zayn on my left, distributing two tacos on each plate. 

"Let's eat!"

***

We spent the rest of the weekend sitting in, distracting ourselves (but mostly me; I get fussy without a lot of attention outside of school) with board games and whatnot. Then Monday rolled on by.

I had to go back to my mum's house, an experience I never really had a predilection for. I sat in the backseat of Niall's van (not in my booster seat) and stared outside the window numbly. I hated Mondays; since I wasn't old enough to live on my own, I couldn't legally live with Zayn and Niall in their homey flat. 

We pulled up to the curb of my childhood house. As I stepped out of the car, Ziall flocked me with affection and reminders that their phones were on and that I could call them if anything went wrong. I hugged them before they got back in the car and drove off, telling me they'd see me at school. I smiled sadly as I watched their van disappear over the bend of the road. 

I turned to face the door, hesitating before knocking on it lightly. I knew my mum was alone in there. After she recovered from her dark years, Gemma left and never came back, only staying in contact with me. I remember being so terrified when Mum started dating again, but the man she'd been seeing, Robin Twist, was a kind, mellow man with a heart of gold. I was never scared of him; he spoiled me rotten and treated me as his own. He knew everything about me: my favorite color, my sexuality, my favorite outfit, and even my liking to feminine clothing. I told him everything. 

Last year, while I was at Ziall's house just lazing about, I'd gotten the news of Robin's death. I remember getting so upset and distraught that I'd made myself sick, which scared me and made me more upset and so forth. I was hospitalized that night. When I'd woken up the day after, Zayn and Niall were at my bedside with solemn expressions on their faces. 

It was truly the worst I'd ever felt in my entire life; the one person I'd trusted more than anyone had just left me. 

I shook my head rid of such dark thoughts as I heard the lock on the door click unlocked. I smiled wryly at my mother as she appeared behind the door with a bright smile. 

I threw my backpack on and turned to exit the house. I slowly descended down the steps, being cautious of my mother's presence. Once, I saw she'd disappeared, I made my way out the door with my suitcase in hand, my other hand holding a death grip on one of the straps of my backpack. 

I quickly speed-walked away from the house until it was out of view, slowing down when I felt safe. It wasn't always like this and I'm afraid it's like this, now. I wished things could go back to the way we were before I was plagued with fear and dark experiences. I pulled out my phone to check the time:  _6:35._ I had a good half hour to get to school. I kept at a leisurely pace, just enjoying my surroundings and just being engulfed by nature. I guess you could say I was a bit of a naturalist, in a sense; I loved nature and did the bare minimum to preserve it. I was peacefully enjoying my silence and solitude when I was frightened out of my unawareness by the honking of a nearby car. 

I stopped to see Louis gesturing for me to get in his car, not even trying to roll down his windows and properly grasp my attention. 

I chewed the bottom of my lip anxiously, not particularly too enticed to hop in the passenger's side of the car of someone who I barely knew. Plus, the short relationship we've gotten to form i wasn't all too cherry. I checked my phone. It had just turned 6:41. I weighed my options quickly: I could either get in the car with the man that might potentially hate me or walk alone for a while. In the midst of the moment, I spewed a mental ' _what the heck'_ and proceeded to climb into the passenger's side of Louis' car. 

I clutched my suitcase to my chest, feeling uncomfortable and out of my element. As previously stated, I wasn't one to go out of my comfort zone or engage in public interaction without either Zayn and/or Niall by my side or prompting my every response.  

"Give me your suitcase," Louis demanded. I eyed him warily. Sensing my hesitance, he rolled his eyes. "I'll put it in the trunk so you're not holding it the entire time," he elaborated. I handed him the suitcase silently and watched as he unbuckled himself and proceeded to do as said. In his absence, I contemplated making an escape, but almost immediately shot down the idea; he had my suitcase and it'd only take me longer to get to school. 

Once Louis re-entered the vehicle, he buckled himself in and began driving on the way to school. It was an awkward first few minutes driving in silence before finally deciding to make an attempt to engage in conversation with me.

"So, these Zach and Niel characters, how close are you with them?" My eyes widened in surprise. I stuttered, my mouth temporarily unable to compute speech of any sort. "Are you in a relationship with them? Fucking them for fun?" he pressed on, causing me to feel uncomfortable and flustered. 

"Erm, no," I finally answered, sounding uncertain even though I knew for a fact that what I felt for them was nothing more than platonic, friendly love. "I'm not--we're not in any relationship. I mean, not  _that_ kind of relationship, but--"

"What's that mean?" he interrupted, "What relationship are you guys in?" I looked out the window, seeing our school come to view. Sensing my relief, Louis looked ahead before slowing down to a more leisurely pace. My anxiety spiked up, all plans of escape evading my mind. 

"Nothing, it means nothing," I gritted as my hand clenched the door tightly. Louis snorted and rolled his eyes. 

"I hope you know I don't mind being late to school. Hell, I wouldn't mind skipping a few classes, while we're at it." I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. 

"Louis, please let me out," I squeaked, nearly on the verge of tears. I looked up to him to see a flash of concern run through him, and as quick as it came, it passed. 

"Are you fucking them? Are they fucking you? What the fuck's up with you and them?" He wouldn't stop. I felt uncomfortable with his vulgar language and blunt phrases. 

"No, no, no!" I protested, blushing. "I don't f-feel comfortable." 

"Harry," he called softly. Shocked, I met his gaze. His eyes held a tired expression. He sighed out in frustration, running a hand through his locks roughly. Abruptly, he slammed his hands down on the steering wheel. I jumped and broke out into tears, slipping slightly. 

Apparently, one of my headspace triggers was fear. I began bawling, babbling incoherently. I folded into myself, wanting to feel warm and small. 

" _Shit,_ " I heard Louis mutter. I faintly heard the clicking of a buckle twice, feeling my buckle loosen on the second click. Before I could process anything, I was gently being hauled into someone's caress. I blindly held on to the warmth with a vice grip.  

"Shh, it's alright. I'm sorry." Louis' mellow voice resonated in his chest, calming me to an extent. He held me close to his chest and rocked me slightly.  It was peaceful and quiet before the obnoxious sound of his marimba ringtone sounded between us. His body froze as he fetched his pocket to grab it. Briefly looking at the caller I.D., Louis loosened his grip on me and answered the call.

"Hey, Li," he greeted. There was mumbling on the other line and Louis flashed his eyes down to me for a split second. "Yeah, he's with me." In my state of fuzziness, I couldn't comprehend who was on the other line and why they were concerned about me. I just tightened my grip on Louis and nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck. 

I needed someone to care for me at that moment and Louis was the only one providing me any sort of comfort. Speaking of, he muttered a few more things into the phone quietly and hung up, aiming his attention back on me.

"Harry," he spoke in an emotionless tone, "we have to get going." I understood I needed to get 'big' again but it suddenly seemed like a struggle. I looked out the window to see we were in the parking lot of the school, Ziall and Liam headed our way. I detached myself from Louis, seeing Niall's concerned countenance. The passengers door was opened and I was suddenly in Zayn's arms.

"Hare-bear, are you okay?!" Niall exclaimed. I nodded against Zayn's chest. I could faintly hear Liam and Louis conversing quietly. Zayn sighed.

"Ni, we might have to take him home," Zayn fretted, giving Niall a look. Niall's eyebrows furrowed together in confusion.

"What triggered him?" he questioned silently, stiffening before turning to Louis. I watched as Niall glared at Louis, taking a step towards him threateningly.

"What did you do to him?" he seethed. Louis looked to him in brash confusion and surprise before composing himself and leveling a glare of his own with Niall's.

"I-I didn't do  _anything_!" Louis growled, blushing fiercely. Liam sighed and took a step into the conversation.

"Louis accidentally overwhelmed a bit," Liam explained. Zayn nodded curtly to him and pressed me further into his chest.

"What's wrong with him, anyways?" Louis asked, voicing his confusion.

"There's nothing wrong with him! You're just a jerk!" Niall boomed. Zayn placed me on his hip and placed a hand on Niall's shoulder.

"Let's go home, baby," he proposed, leaning in closer to whisper in Niall's ear. "We gotta take care of bubba."

Niall nodded and sighed, smiling tiredly and waved to Liam before Zayn bid his goodbye and left with me on his hip.


	6. Chapter Five: Making Arrangements

I hated how weak and dependent I could be at times.

I was swaddled in the warmth of Niall's arms, in his lap as we rocked gently on the couch in the living room. Zayn was pacing in front of us silently, running his hand through his hair and tugging every now and then. The sight of a distraught Zayn frightened Niall and I into a worried silence. Such a stressful atmosphere really messed with my headspace: I wanted to be there for them and possibly defuse the situation but at the same time, I wanted to crawl into the comfort of my nappies and dummies and not worry about anything. I was frazzled by such a predicament. 

"Okay," Zayn finally huffed, capturing the attention of both Niall and I and successfully pulling me out of my frustrating mental battle. "So, Liam knows and he's told us he hasn't told Louis," he began, "Louis was clueless, a sign that Liam was honest and he's a step closer to being possibly trustworthy." Niall and I nodded. I slowly slid off of Niall's lap but kept myself in his arms, silently signalling where my headspace stood. 

Zayn caught the act and flashed a small, appreciative smile at my mental presence. I returned it with one of my own as Niall squeezed me gently. Zayn continued rambling on.

"I think it's best if we don't tell Louis any of this--there's no telling what he'd do with the info. I don't know and I don't plan on finding out." Niall shuddered above me as I frowned. 

I contemplated telling him how magnificently he handled me when I had involuntarily slipped. Louis, although a bit reluctant at the start, provided me with exactly what I needed in that moment: care, attention, and reassurance. 

I thought it best to keep my mouth closed.  _I'm too tired, anyways._

"Harry? Did you hear me?" I blinked at Zayn slowly, blushing as I slowly shook my head.

"Zayn was just asking if anything really bad happened before we got there," Niall repeated for me. My frown deepened.

"No. He just--I just got overwhelmed," I muttered. Zayn nodded thoughtfully. 

"Liam was telling us that he's not that bad. I want to believe him, I really do. It's just, with the way he's been treating you and how--how  _rude_ he acts, it's just so hard!" Niall grumbled, throwing his hands up which made me sit up a bit more. 

"Well, I just met him, so..." I let the fragment hang in the silence between  us. Zayn shared a look with Niall and Niall responded with one of his own. It was as if I were watching some sort of sign language occur right before me. 

"Okay, I have an idea that just might backfire," Zayn proposed cautiously. I raised an eyebrow in curiosity. Niall sighed. 

"We'd been thinking about this for a while and we only want what's best for you--you know that, right?" Niall asked. I tensed up.  _Were they going to tell me that they didn't want me to be their baby, anymore?_   I began to panic. This lifestyle had become a part of me and to just suddenly  _not_ indulge in it would be absolutely catastrophic. Sensing my anxiousness, Niall rubbed up and down my arm soothingly. 

"Whatever you're thinking, darling, it's probably not that," he comforted soothingly. I nodded and let out a shaking sigh, urging myself not to get too worked up over nothing. Zayn glanced at me worriedly. 

"Do you need a moment, sweets? Are you okay?" I pulled myself together and nodded, giving him a wobbly smile. He replied with a reassuring smile of his own.

"I'm gonna finish up, now, okay?" He spoke tentatively, as if afraid he might provoke a breakdown. I laughed shortly at my foolishness. 

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just overthinking and--yeah." Zayn nodded letting out a relieved sigh and smiling brightly, clapping his hands together. 

"Alrighty, then! First things first, please don't freak out, okay?" I rolled my eyes fondly at his constant worrying. 

"Zaynie, at the rate you're going at, you'll have frown-lines and worry-wrinkles at 25," I ratted off sarcastically. Zayn scoffed. 

"Au contraire, mon ami. I'm still gonna be looking quite  _lit._ " I cringe at his millennial-ized term of phrase. I wrinkled my face up in distaste. 

"Please don't  _ever!_ " I giggled. Niall ruffed up my hair and suddenly the tense atmosphere suddenly diminishing, disintegrating into nothingness. 

We all shared a quick laugh as I swatted Niall's hand away and did what I could with my hair. It's moments like these I do my best to cherish: all of us just joking and messing around together. We eventually sobered up enough to carry an actual conversation. 

"So, Liam is taking us out tomorrow--" I interrupted by gasping and clapping almost furiously.

"I'm so happy for you guys!" I exclaimed. 

"--and he says Louis could watch you." I immediately stopped clapping, my smiled falling off my face. 

"What?" I sputtered. Niall and Zayn glanced to each other nervously, Niall biting his lip. 

"We haven't told him about, you know  _everything_ , but Liam says it'd be a nice way for him to warm up to you."

I immediately began freaking out.  _What if he doesn't like me? What if he accidentally walks into my baby room? What if he causes me to slip again and I--_

 _"_ Harry, you can say no," Niall offered, interrupting all of the worst case scenarios running through my mind. "We'll just--we'll just cancel the date."

"Niall!" Zayn gasped. "We might never get this opportunity again! You know how hard it is to find--"

"We love you enough to make  _sacrifices_ for you," Ni gritted, "Isn't that right, Zaynie?" Zayn was silent, running a hand through his hair and sighing.

"Yeah," he mumbled. I felt absolutely terrible; I didn't want to be the reason they miss out on possible true love.  _Ugh, I don't know what to do! I don't usually make my own decisions..._

"I'll do it," I blurted out abruptly. I watched as Zayn's eyes brightened and a smile broke out on his face. Niall tried, failing, to be reticent with his excitement. 

"Are you sure?" he asked softly, wrapping an arm around my middle comfortingly. 

"y-yeah. I think so," I answered uneasily. If I had to make a personal sacrifice to ensure Zayn and Niall's happiness, then so be it. 

 

**Louis' POV**

It was later on into the day. Liam and I decided to just skip the entire day, seeing as this morning's activities had us both lost in thought. 

We were lounging at my house, sitting down on the sofa in the living room while the t.v. played some random show that neither of us were paying attention to. After a while of silence, Liam sighed and turned to face me, piquing my interest. 

"Louis," he began, "you're my best friend, you know that?"

"What d'ya want?" I deadpanned, wanting to skip the shit and get right to the point.

"Well, Zayn, Niall, and I are going out, right? Yeah, so, like--yeah, okay, uhm--" I watched in amusement as Liam stumbled over his words anxiously.

 

"--And I was wondering if you'd be up for it?" I blinked at Liam, completely missing all context. 

"Um, repeat that," I requested. Liam rolled his eyes fondly. 

"I was wonder if, while we're out, you'd be okay to watch Harry for the--"

"I think not!" I interrupted. 

 

I shook my head feverishly, completely against the idea. Liam then pulled the puppy eyes on me. 

I looked away immediately, trying my best to delay the inevitable. I did  _not_ want to be stuck with Harry just so Liam could score a good fuck. 

"Liam, I refuse to do this for the sole purpose of you getting some," I snarled, rolling my eyes. 

"Louis, please!" he begged, "I'm genuinely interested in them! I--I think this might actually go somewhere and I don't want to miss out on it..." Liam sighed. 

"Never mind. I'll just tell them I can'--" 

"Fucking  _hell_ , mate!  _Fine!_ " I relented in a recalcitrant manner. Liam jumped up and ambushed me in a hug. I groaned and grumbled. 

"You're the best, Louis!" I rolled my eyes and smiled fondly at Liam.

"You better plan a good ass date, 'cause I didn't just offer my free time for this to go to shit," I huffed. Liam smiled brightly. 

"I'll plan it right now!" he basically hollered before running down the hall and towards the guest room. "Thanks again, Loueh!" I sighed and shook my head. 

"What an idiot." 


	7. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to @panworld for reminding me that this book exists lol thx bub xx

It was a little under a week after the incident that it was time for Ziall and Liam's date. I was ever so anxious; this was the first time I was ever being supervised by anyone other than Zayn or Niall. I spent the morning in headspace, but the closer it got to date time, I found myself going between headspaces, wanting to help but at the same time wanting to be rid of the gnawing anxiety.

All in all, it had been a tough morning.

Zayn and Niall did their absolute best to calm me down, although their futile attempts were in vain. I wanted to cooperate, I really did, but I was just so blinded with  _fear_ that making their lives a little easier wasn't my main priority.  

"Harry, you need to calm down," Niall sighed in mild frustration as he rummaged his closet for "something presentable". Zayn was cleaning the house, making sure none of my toys or little items lingered. I ran a hand through my unruly curls, tugging them in slight distress. 

I closed my eyes and sighed, laying back on Ziall's bed as anxiety took over like a tsunami taking over a small, under-developed town. I settled for some self-encouragement, trying to pull myself together.  _What's the worst that could happen, right?_  

Okay, so  _not_ a good idea. 

I was taking some refreshing deep breaths when there was a series of knocks on the door. My eyes immediately shot to Niall, who looked out into the hall before looking back to me; he offered me a nervous smile. 

"Well, that must be Louis, yeah?" I didn't answer. I merely followed as Niall briskly walked out of the room. I followed him past the kitchen and into the living area. He pointed to the couch silently and I took that as a silent command to sit; so that's exactly what I did. 

I waited patiently as hushed whispers were faintly heard from the front door. I rummaged the couch for the remote control to busy myself, finding it and turning on the tellie. Spongebob was airing, much to my childish delight. I tuned out my nervousness and divulged myself in the cartoon, laughing as the characters performed silly acts.

I failed to notice three figures enter the room, finding myself deeply entranced on the tellie. That was, until I heard Zayn clearing his throat. I immediately whipped my head in the direction of the three men, who were all staring down at me expectantly. I blushed.

"Uh, hi," I muttered, casting my eyes downward. Niall clapped his hands together excitedly.

"So," he began with joy, "Liam's waiting outside for us."  Zayn wrapped his arm around Niall.

"We just wanted to go over a few things with Louis and tell him your routine and whatnot. We'll be back in a little bit, darling." Zayn and Niall proceeded to hug me and exit the house. After they left, I looked up to Louis, who stood their almost awkwardly before deciding to sit on the couch to my left.

"So," Louis started, causing me to turn his way,"why can't you stay home alone?"

It should've been a casual question, something I couldn't easily answer. I squirmed uncomfortably.

"Um, I just--I don't like being alone," I excused pathetically. Louis looked as if he didn't believe me.

"Of course," he remarked sarcastically, rolling his eyes. I watched as he crossed his arms across his chest. 

"What the fuck is this shit?" he scoffed at the tellie. I flinched at his use of vulgar language, frowning at him. 

"Please stop," I practically whispered. Louis tsked and popped a stick of gum into his mouth.

"Can you stop that, please?" I huffed as he chewed his gum obnoxiously loud. 

"Look, just because I'm babysitting you, that doesn't mean you can just  _boss me around_ ," he snapped, freezing before a smirk slowly crept its way onto his face. "If anything,  _you_ should be listening to  _me_."I stiffened uncomfortably and directed my attention back to Spongebob. After a while of discomforting smile, I sighed, standing up on shaky legs. 

"I have to go to the bathroom," I mumbled before making a quick exit. I closed the door behind me when I entered the bathroom in Ziall's bedroom, sliding my back down the door and proceeding to start sobbing. I looked to the ceiling to possibly halt the stream of tears but failed, bowing my head and letting my sudden depression overwhelm me. 

It felt like hours I sat there, my knees held against my chest as my arms wrapped around them with a death vice grip. I felt so alone; Louis obviously didn't want to be here and neither Zayn or Niall were available to soothe me.  _Come to think of it, they hadn't even called or texted me to see if I was okay._ I pulled my phone out to affirm my assumption only to be found disappointingly correct. I whimpered in emotional pain. I just felt so  _alone._ I hated it; I hated having to be alone when I've learned to become so dependent, and I didn't know what to do with myself. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

"H-Harry, are you in there?"I heard Louis softly ask. I quietly cleared my throat and scrubbed my face, sniffling softly as I took my time opening the door. I took a deep breath before greeting him. 

"Hey," I muttered quietly, managing a small, weak smile. Louis' stone cold eyes seemed to soften just a bit as he frowned in concerned. 

"You okay?" he queried. I nodded, catching a few stray tears and managing a bigger smile. 

"Okay, then," Louis turned to leave. I sighed, beginning to close the bathroom door and resume my self-pity party, when he turned around.

"Harry?" I lifted my head to meet his gaze. "Do you-- _fuck_ \-- do you wanna go somewhere?" he mumbled, stuffing his hands into the front pockets of his jeans and shuffling his feet a little. 

"R-really?" I took a step out of the bathroom. Louis nodded, a half-smile on his face. 

"Yeah we can go anywhere you--"

"Can we go to the park?" I interrupted in excitement, feeling my sadness practically drain out of my heart at the idea of swinging on the swingset or sliding down the--

"Sure. Let's go."

***

We decided to walk to the park, seeing as the park wasn't too far from Ziall's house and Louis got a ride from Liam, who would come to pick him up after date night. When we arrived to the park, I immediately ran for the slide. I giggled, compacting my body in such a way as to fit down the slide. 

"Wee!" I exclaimed as I descended down the slide. I let out a huff of joy as I hit the bottom, quickly dashing for the swingsets. I could faintly hear footsteps running after me, Louis muttering a faint ' _jesus christ_ ' under his breath. 

Once I had settled on the slide, I looked to Louis expectantly as he doubled over on his knees and panted. I smiled at him brightly, faintly feeling my headspace going fuzzy but completely ignoring it. After he'd finished his overdramatic display of exhaustion, Louis looked to me in confusion. 

"What?" He asked. I just stared up at him, smiling so pretty so that he'd  _have_ to give in. 

Realization soon settled into Louis mind as he began to frantically shake his head. 

"Oh  _no_! No, no, no!" he protested. I pouted at him. 

"Pretty please?" I pleaded. He hesitated before sighing, taking his stance behind me. I began to clap before gripping the chains of the swingset. I felt Louis begin to pull the swing back and up. 

"Liam better fucking  _love_ me after this," he grumbled before letting the swing go and launching me into flight. I squealed as I began soaring, having the time of my life. 

This went on for a good little while: me, enjoying myself and Louis just quietly assisting when necessary. Then, the sun began to set. 

"Louis,"  I called in a childish manner, making grabby hands at him. He looked to me in puzzlement and registered what I was hinting at when I pointed to the sun. Silently, we found a comfortable patch of grass to sit on and watched the sun set, sitting a foot or two apart. I smiled as the sun slowly disappeared behind the horizon. 

"What makes you so interesting, Harry?" Louis broke the silence, but when I glanced over to him, his eyes were still glued onto the disappearing sun. 

"I ask myself that everyday," I replied quietly, languishly returning my gaze back to the horizon. We sat there for what felt like hours, just silently staring at what had become the night sky. 

 

"...We should head back." 

 

 

 


	8. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to do another little short update because why not? xx

When we arrived back to the house, no words were exchanged between us. Louis took his shoes off at the front door and wandered back into the living room, where the tellie had remained playing. Something came over me, causing me to smile about nothing, and I hummed happily. I gently removed my shoes, holding back my excess energy and skipped to Ziall's room, before turning around and deciding to go to my big room. 

I wrinkled my nose at the maturity of it all, craving to feel small. I rummaged through my closet for a pair of sweats. I decided to ditch the shirt; it wasn't necessary. I proceeded to dress myself and meandered back into the living room where Louis sat, staring down at his phone instead of Little Einsteins. 

"Can you turn this shi--can you turn off the tellie?" Louis stumbled over his words, blushing and avoiding eye contact. I preened at his attempt to refrain from any imprecations of any sort. I silently obeyed, turning off the t.v. I sighed and looked to Louis.

"Hey," I called out softly. He lifted his head with an arched eyebrow. "I'm--I'm not with Zayn and Niall." Louis pocketed his phone.

"Really?" He began to compose himself, turning his body to face me.

I nodded in affirmation. "Have you ever been with them? Romantically?" I shook my head, crossing my feet under me. 

"No. It's never crossed my mind," I elaborated, "Zayn and Niall--they're my only friends, my best friends. I have no love for the m that isn't brotherly...in a way, I guess." I scratched the back of my neck awkwardly. 

"What does that mean?" Louis pestered. I blushed, shifting my weight in discomfort.

"Nothing," I mumbled. "I just--I don't want you thinking I 'love-love' them and all," I rambled, throwing my hands up limply. Louis nodded slowly, sitting back with a small smile on his face. 

 

 

"You're an odd one, Harry," Louis observed as he pulled out a pack of fags from his back pocket. I frowned, watching as he stood up and made his way to the door.

"Where are you going?" I called out to him. He paused and turned back to me, shaking his pack.

"Going out for a quick smoke." I pouted. 

"What about me?" I whined quietly. Louis smirked a bit. 

"You'll handle, princess."  _Princess._ I watched in a slight state of daze as he shot me a quick wink and left barefoot. I couldn't hide the smile that broke out on my face. 

I squealed to myself, doing a little shimmy. I was finally getting somewhere with Louis; we might've started out on the wrong foot, but his truly true colors were showing. And he wasn't the dark, gloomy, bitter figure I thought he was. No, not at all. Louis was a rainbow--a rainbow porcupine. No--!

"A rainbow hedgehog!" I exclaimed. I covered my mouth before realizing I was alone. I burst out into a fit of laughter. In the midst of my laughter, I heard the door close, looking up to see Louis. 

"Liam's outside," he stated, pointing his thumb back to the door behind him. I frowned a bit.  _I was just getting close to him._ I sighed and stood up from the couch where I sat as Louis put his shoes on. 

"Are Zayn and Niall out there?" Louis snorted.

"Of course! They should be comin' in, in about a few--"

" _HARRY!!"_ I was immediately engulfed in Niall's embrace, Zayn's chuckling close behind him. I heard Liam let out a little laugh. I smiled.

"Hi, NiNi," I greeted as Niall let me go. Zayn approached me and pat my shoulder. 

"Hey, bubs," Zayn cooed silently, just for us to hear. I blushed, smiling up at him.

"So,"" Liam began, causing my attention to trail to his groomed figure. 

"Everything went swimmingly, I assume?" he queried, sending a wary glance Louis' way. Louis rolled his eyes. 

"Yes, Liam, he's alive and his well-being is intact," he drawled out sarcastically. I giggled.

"Louis was nice. We had...a nice time," I rephrased, sending a secret smile Louis' way. He returned it with one of his own, shooting me another one of his discreet winks. Liam clapped a hand down on Louis' shoulder, smiling watts. 

"That's great to hear!" Liam laughed a bit. "Well, Louis and I ought to be on our way, right, Lou?" He didn't wait for Louis to answer. 

"I'll text you guys! Night, Harry!" Liam hollered on his way out to his car. Louis followed but paused halfway out the door before turning around once more. 

"Night, Harry." I smiled, waving my fingers at him before he was gone. 

"Well, how was everything?" Niall asked as Zayn disappeared into their room contently. I nodded slowly.

"It was good. Fun. Nice," I rambled as Niall led me down the hall with my two rooms. We stood between the two.

"What are we feeling like tonight, huh?" I paused, really thinking it through, before gesturing to my little room. Niall clapped his hands excitedly. 

"Let's getcha ready for bed then!!"


	9. Chapter Eight

I woke up contently. It was the next day; Niall and Zayn were still floating on cloud nine, Ni skipping about and eager to have me in my little space while Zayn was more affectionate towards the both of us, disregarding his usual taciturn manner. 

"Oh, Hazzie!" Niall sang as he pranced into the room. I looked up to him, giggling and clapping happily. Niall sighed contently and crouched down to pick me up from my sat position on the floor of my little room. "Who's my little princess!" 

_Princess._ My mind immediately connected the pet name to Louis: Louis' smile, Louis' peacefulness, Louis' slightly domineering persona--just  _Louis_. And I smiled the biggest I've ever smiled and felt giddiness bubble in me as I burst out in joy and happiness. I began to blush and hide my face in the crook of Niall's neck.  _I like Louis. Louis is my--_

_"_ Daddy!" Niall hit Zayn's arm as he walked in. 

"Zayn!" he reprimanded playfully, "Bubba's little, you can't say things about Lili like that!" Zayn laughed as Niall ambushed him with weak, playful hits to his chest.

"Okay, okay!" he managed to exclaim between his laughter. Once he'd calmed down he pressed a kiss to the top of my head, squeezing Niall's hip. I watched silently as he picked up miscellaneous items from the ground, lying my head down on NiNi's shoulder. 

"You know what today is, right, Bubs?" Zayn asked as he continued on meandering about the room and cleaning things. I groaned in realization. 

"School!" Niall squealed, whispering cheering as he began twirling me about. I tried to maintain my grumpy composure but couldn't keep a smile from breaking out on my face at Niall's odd tactics. He set me down and then grasped my hand, leading me out of my little room and into my big room. I pouted a bit, reluctant to ready myself for school. 

"Yay! School time!!!"

***

When we pulled into the school parking lot in the van. Zayn put the car into park and turned it off as Niall unbuckled both himself and I, grabbing my binders out of my hand and into his. In a comfortable silence, we all walked to my locker, Zayn watching bypassers protectively as I grabbed my stuff. Niall kept a steady hand on my lower back. I was surprised when his hand disappeared and I was hugged from behind. I jumped a little as I could feel someone's breath close to my ear.

" _Hey, Harry._ " Louis' sultry voice filled my very being with butterflies. I blushed, quickly slamming my locker shut and turning to face him. I'd realized he'd caged me in between his arms and nearly stopped breathing at our close proximity. I cleared my throat.

"Um--hi," I greeted breathlessly. Louis laughed, mesmerizing me with his beauty. 

I confused myself:  _Wasn't he a complete meanie not even a month ago?  I don't see him for a week and all of a sudden one day of bonding's got me upside down?_ I mentally scoffed. Louis was a big bully, but I didn't know what to think in that exact moment. 

"Class starts fairly soon, love," I heard Zayn warn, eyeing Louis cautiously. Although they were ecstatic that last night went well, they were quick to inform me of the caution they still had around the two of us. I didn't comment, having nothing to say as I hugged my binders tomy chest, staring at the ground. 

"May I walk you to class?" Louis proposed. My eyebrows raised in disbelief. Ziall shared my expression of surprise, also confused as to why Louis Tomlinson, all-around rebellious kid would turn down beating up some innocent teens to walk me to my designated first period classroom. 

"Are you, are you  _sure_?" I asked hesitantly, my gaze fluttering to Ziall. Louis caught on to what I was implying.

"If that's alright with you two, of course." He stepped back, releasing me from the physical barriers he called arms. He turned his attention to Zayn and Niall. The two looked to one another anxiously, Niall worrying his bottom lip and Zayn in deep thought.

"Um--I, I guess I don't see why not..?" Niall approved unsurely. Louis clapped his hands together and turned back to me, hold his hands out. I furrowed my eyebrows in puzzlement. 

"Your binders." 

"Oh." 

I handed him my binders, waving to Zee & Ni as we began to venture off to my class. There was a mildly uncomfortable silence that engulfed us until I took it into my own hands to start up a casual conversation.

"How do you know where my class is?" I blurted awkwardly. 

 He blushed a bit.

"Uh, remember when I chased you down the halls to first period?" I nodded slowly in understanding.

"Oh," I responded with. The atmosphere surrounding us grew very uncomfortable. Eventually, Louis sighed and turned to face me, stopping.

"Harry, can we just start over? I mean, if Liam, Zayn, and Niall are going to be a thing soon, shouldn't we be able to forget the past and start over?" I thought about it. Sure, Louis' first impression wasn't all too... _appealing_ , but it did happen over a month ago. Plus, the side I've seen of him since then hasn't been all too bad. I smiled brightly at Louis and thrusted my arm out to him.

"Hi, I'm Harry and my favorite color is--it's blue," I introduced, changing my original color, orange, to the beautiful blue hue of his eyes. Louis' smile brightened like the sun. He grasped my hand with a gentle firmness.

"Hey, I'm Louis and my favorite color...I'll get back to you on that," he winked. I giggled at his silliness. We made small talk as we made our way to my classroom. When we made it to the room,  I turned to Louis and blushed as I saw that he was already looking at me. 

"Shouldn't you head off to class?" I prompted as the bell music rang. Louis pretended to put some thought into my words.

"I should, shouldn't I?" He responded, mockingly checking his nails.

"Lou!" I exclaimed, landing a gentle slap to his chest and rolling my eyes playfully. I turned and walked into the classroom, settling myself into my seat. I turned to see if Louis was still standing in the doorway. I realized he wasn't there when it hit me.

Louis let me call him 'Lou'.

***

When the bell rang, signaling the end of fifth period, I gave my daily farewell to my fifth period teacher and made a beeline for Ziall's chemistry classroom. When I entered the classroom, I was surprised to see who was there. 

"Louis," I called in surprise. Niall and Louis were having a nice laugh while Zayn cleaned up the remnants of their lab from the class. Louis looked up and smiled, quickly making his way over to me with open arms.

"Harry!"

I let Louis engulf me in his arms and indulged myself in his embrace. I loved a good hug after a long day. I looked over Louis' shoulder to see Niall and Zayn staring at us with faint smiles on their faces, their hands intertwined. Louis soon pulled back. 

"Apparently Zee and Ni are in the same year as me," Louis shared, nodding his head back to the couple. As he mentioned their names, I went over to embrace them as well.

"Hi, buttercup," Niall hummed into the shell of my ear quietly, his thick Irish accent causing me to let out a little giggle as he pried my binders from my grasp and softly nudged me in the direction of Zayn. Zayn hugged me briefly.

"Hello, there, bubs," he greeted as he pressed a quick kiss to my forehead. I glanced to Louis and surely he saw. He shot me a look of confusion and dismissed it with a curt shake of my head.

"Well, uh, I'll talk to you tomorrow?" I stated in a confused manner at Louis, insinuating that I had no idea when we'd speak to one another because,  _surely_ this was a one time thing.

"I was actually wondering if you would spend lunch with me," Louis proposed. I frowned. I wanted to enjoy my daily lunchtime littlespace and have Ziall spoil me with attention.  _I mean I guess I wouldn't mind Louis' attention but he wouldn't understand._

"I--"

"He can't," Niall butted in, "we have something to do at lunch." I blushed and looked down to my boots. It was silent for a moment.

"Are you, Harry?" Louis asked softly, stepping forward and placing a reassuring hand on my forearm. I looked up to him and smiled warmly.

"Yeah," I rasped out quietly, not feeling the need to project due to our close proximity. Louis sighed with a small frown but stepped back with a nod.

"Alright." He pulled out his phone and handed it to me. "Can I at least get your number? You know, in case I have to babysit again and you have some special request or want to hang out or summat..." I giggled, programming my number into his phone under 'Princess' before shooting a text to myself and handing it over to him.

"See you around, Lou," I called over my shoulder as Ziall escorted me to our spot. 


	10. Chapter Nine

After school and little time, I sat on my bed turning my phone on, my phone privileges confiscated during littlespace. Not that I minded; having access to the internet in such a vulnerable state isn't the best scenario. I scrolled through my notifications aimlessly before one stood out from the other social media notifs.  

 **Unknown:**   _Hey Harry its Louis lol_

I immediately tapped the message and waited patiently as my iMessaging app loaded. When it finally did, I saved his contact and replied. 

 **Me:** _it's*_

 **Me:** _Hiii xx_

I vacillated before removing the x's and sending the text. I turned off my phone almost immediately and rising up from my bed. I wanted to go somewhere, anywhere. It was a sudden desire to be rid of the bland walls of my room. I walked over to my closet and looked for my worn-out brown boots. 

I slid them on and scavenged my clothing rack for a nice lilac sweater to pair with some dark-washed skinny jeans, finishing the look with a lazily tied bandana.

 

As I was about to leave the house, I checked my phone to see if Louis had texted back.

 **Lou-ser:** _You probably dont know but Im rolling my eyes so hard rn_

 **Lou-ser:**   _Wanna hang out?_

 **Lou-ser:**   _Harreh_

 **Lou-ser:** _HARRRRREEEEEEHHHHH_

I giggled at Louis' silliness before shooting him a few quick texts. 

 **Me:** _Don't*_

 **Me:**   _I'm*_

 **Me:**   _And sure, no need to beg lolz_

 **Me:** _I'm about to go to the park again, wanna join?_

I pocketed my phone after turning on my ringer. I exited my room, popping an earbud into my ear. 

"I'm going to the park!" I hollered to Zayn and Niall as I neared the front door.

"Okay!" I heard Niall reply, "We'll be having some adult-y funti-"

"EWW!" I screeched before practically sprinting out of the house, covering my ears in mock disgust. I laughed to myself as I slammed the door and skipped to the park. I was halfway there when my phone notified me of a text. I took out my phone and unlocked it almost numbly as I checked my iMessages. 

 **Lou-ser:** _I'm already there_

I smiled down at the message and typed one of my own.

 **Me:** _At least you used an apostrophe this time_

 **Lou-ser:** _Wtf is that??_

 **Me:** _omg, the thing between the 'I' and 'm' in the word "I'm"_

 **Lou-ser:** _You mean the upside down coma???_

I facepalmed. 

 **Me:** _First of all_

 **Me:** _Comma*_

 **Me:** _Secondly_

 **Me:** _YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS STUFF UR LITERALLY A JUNIOR SMH_

 **Lou-ser:** _whY DO YOU TYPE SO FAST_

 **Lou-ser:** _I LITERALLY CANNOT KEEP UP_

 **Me:** _What can I say, I'm just text savvy lol_

 **Lou-ser:** _hA_

 **Lou-ser:** _THAT WAS A COMA SPICE_

 **Me:** _Comma Splice*_  

I looked up to see that I had arrived to the park. I smiled as a nice breeze blew by, burrowing myself into my lilac sweater. I closed my eyes and breathed a deep breath. 

 **Me:** _I'm here x._

I waited, wandering around the park a few seconds before I found an empty bench. I looked around, finding myself mesmerized by a little girl playing a frisbee with a grown woman. I wasn't quick to assume it was the child's mother: what if she didn't have a mother? What if the woman were her aunt or a very, very young grand-

 _"Hi, Haz."_  

I nearly jumped out of my skin as Louis's sultry voice invaded my left ear. I quickly turned around with a hand grasping at my beating heart. Louis laughed joyously at my panicked expression as he seated himself next to me. I relaxed myself, frowning at his unfair tactics. 

"You're a meanie face," I pouted, crossing my arms childishly. Louis scoffed playfully.

"You don't mean it," he teased, poking my cheek. It only caused me to frown deeper. 

"Aww, don't be mad at me, princess," he cooed. I blushed, a small smile gracing my features. 

"I love your dimples," Louis commented nonchalantly. 

"I like your smile," I blurted out, turning a darker shade of red. Louis nodded and turned to watch the people in the park. I fiddled with my phone, plugging an earbud in my right ear and listening to the soothing beats of Sam Sure's song "Hunger". I closed my eyes and let my head loll back. I could faintly feel Louis shift closer, his vague presence comforting me. I absentmindedly fiddled with my fingers, wondering if Louis was enjoying himself; I still has some pent up energy to waste but I didn't want to assume that he wanted to play with me. Plus, if we were to play, there would be no promise that I'd stay "big". 

"Whatcha listenin' to, mate?" Louis inquiried, taking it upon himself to pick up my unused earbud. He examined it for a minute before fixing it to his left ear. I watched quietly as he softly nodded his head along to the song. "Nice choice." I practically preened. 

"You know," he began. I turned the music down a bit so we could hold a conversation. "A person's music choice can say a lot about them." I furrowed my eyebrows. 

"What does mine say about me?" I asked. Louis pondered for a few seconds.

"Well, it wasn't mainstream, so you're different. You stand out. In a good way, of course," he rushed to add when he saw my face fall. I nodded with a faint smile on my face, silently pushing him to continue. 

"It was mellow, so I'm assuming you're a pretty chill person. Also, the message was very... _primal,_ in a sense. I mean, the whole song is talking about being hungry for someone." I blushed at his observation. 

"I'm not quite sure how to interpret that. How do you suppose I do?" He turned to me with a mischievous smirk. My cheeks darkened in color as I scrambled to find words.

"I-Uh, I mean-I don't know," I mumbled in embarrassment. Louis slung his arm on my shoulder, giving me a quick pat. 

"Don't sweat it, love. I'm just teasing ya." I smiled up at him before glancing longingly at the park. I  _really_ wanted to go play. 

"We can go if you really want to," Louis proposed, nodding towards the swingset. I brightened almost immediately.

"Really?" I confirmed in excitement. Louis nodded with a warm smile as I dragged him to the swingset. I seated myself on one of the swings and looked up to Louis expectantly. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"What?" I sighed. 

"Can you...can you push me, please?" I asked hesitantly, biting my bottom lip anxiously. I expected Louis to grimace and immediately turn me down. Instead, he smiled and nodded wordlessly. I couldn't stop the squeal that escaped my lips, causing him to chuckle. 

"Ready?" Louis asked as he positioned himself behind me. I gripped the swing chains tightly as I voiced my 'okay'. I could feel the swing being lifted, drawn all the way back before Louis let go.

Suddenly, I was soaring. I could touch the clouds if I wanted to. I could see birds and the sun's punishing glare blocking my eyes and making me squint. I smiled nonetheless, feeling the wind hit my back as I descended from the sky, only to repeat the thrilling process.

"Higher! Higher!" I chanted, giggling as Louis huffed and puffed in exaggeration. There was a peaceful silence that engulfed us, gently prodded with every small giggle or squeal that I voiced as I could feel myself slipping deeper and deeper...

I closed my eyes, my arms going limp on the swingset chains, as I allowed myself to just be happy. In this exact moment I felt so much: I felt for the little girl with the frisby. I felt for the young grandma playing with the little girl. I felt for Zayn and Niall and Liam and Louis. 

Louis. I felt a lot for Louis. I had so much-many, many feelings.  _I wan' show him me feelin's._ I felt a pretty smile on my face and I wanted to hug everyone and just-- _ouch._

I opened my eyes to find a concerned Louis staring down at me, his eyebrows drawn together in worry. I looked around to see I had flown off my swing and was chucked into the mulch. I hissed in pain as i sat up with Louis's assistance. I looked down at my legs and caught the nasty sight of a bloody knee covered in dirt and mulch. I looked to Louis who was blowing away some of the mulch before promptly bursting into tears. 

 _"Louis!"_  


	11. Chapter Ten

**Louis's POV**

_"Louis!"_

I looked frantically at Harry as he bursted into tears. I looked around for any source of water, spotting a nearby river. I picked Louis up bridal-style and hiked over to it, all the while hushing and cooing Harry to sniffles. As we neared the bank of the body of water, I gently lowered Harry to the ground and brought him closer to the edge of the shore. I cupped water in my hands and cautiously poured the liquid over his messy knee. The dirt cleared away, unveiling a scraped knee; nothing too damaging. After assessing his injury, I pulled out my phone to call Liam.

_"'Ello?"_ Liam answered.

"Hey, I'm probably not going to bring your car in on time," I let down gently. He groaned.

_"What for this time?"_ he deadpanned,  _"Found another fling?"_ I rolled my eyes at his assumption, transferring the phone from my hand to between my shoulder and ear, picking up Harry and placing him on my hip. Although an odd action, it just felt... _natural._

"No," I replied, denying Liam's accusation. "Actually, I'm at the park with Harry. He scraped his knee and started crying, so I--"

_"Wait, **Harry?**_ _"_ Liam queried in a tone of concern. I furrowed my eyebrows at his sudden urgency.

"Uh...yeah," I answered awkwardly as I began to walk Harry to the car, his face buried in my neck. 

_"I'll text you Niall and Zayn's address and phone numbers. Take him home immediately and--"_

"Liam," I interrupted as I opened the passenger door and placed Harry in the seat, the latter whimpering at the loss of touch. I cooed to him hesitantly kissed his forehead, not wanting to freak him out by my babying him.  _Why **am** I babying him?_

"He'll be fine. It's just a scraped knee," I rationalized as I quickly made my way to the driver's side and buckled us both in.As I turned the key in the ignition, Harry gripped my bicep and nuzzled his face into it. I smiled and began driving.

_"Louis, he's--Harry's different,"_ Liam stuttered over the phone, slight shuffling being heard from his line. I looked over to Harry curiously before returning to my conversation with Liam.

"What does  _that_  mean?"I asked, my interest officially piqued. There was a short silence. 

_"I'll add Zayn and Niall to the call."_ I stifled a groan and instead sighed as I was put on hold. Once we hit a red light, I sat the phone on my lap and put it on speaker so that I'd know when the call resumed.

"You okay, H?" I asked, placing a comforting hand on his thigh. He sighed, playing with my fingers and mumbling to himself.  _Maybe he's insane._ There was still no sound being emitted from my phone, meaning Liam was either still trying to track down Niall and Zayn or that he was sidetracked by a conversation. The red light had eventually turned green and I gently hit the gas pedal. As I went to place both hands on the wheel, softly shrugging Harry off, Harry whimpered and tightened his grip on my arm, refusing to let go. 

"No," he pouted, nuzzling his face in my bicep. I sighed and continued the route to my apartment. As I approached yet another red light, the phone in my lap sounded.

_"Harry?? Baby, you there?"_ Harry perked up at the sound of my phone.

"Zaynie," he whined in confusion, searching for the source of sound. I tapped his arm and pointed to my lap, where the phone was located. His eyes brightened but he made no move to grab for it. 

_"Harebear! It's me, Mu--Niall,"_ I heard Niall stutter. MY face twisted in puzzlement. 

"Nini, I-I got a boo-boo!" Harry exclaimed brokenly, poking his knee and hissing in pain, tears gathering in his eyes. I gently swatted his hand away, keeping one hand on the wheel as the light turned green, making a face of disapproval. Harry pouted. 

_"Oh no, bubba! Are you okay, my love?"_ Niall cooed, placing me deeper into my confuddlement. I sighed, deciding to make my presence known.

"He's with me, Niall," I stated. There was a short little silence before Liam began speaking. 

_"Lou and Harry were at the park when he scraped his knee and...I think it **triggered** something," _ Liam worded almost cautiously. I heard Zayn groan. 

_"Bring him home,"_ he demanded. I scoffed. 

"Why does everyone believe that I'm suddenly unable to tend to a  _scraped knee_??" I asked, taking offense to their lack of faith in my medical experience. "If you don't remember, Liam, my mother was a nurse in her prime." Liam went silent. 

_"Look, Louis,"_ Niall began,  _"It's not that we believe you don't--it's just, Harry is a very....he's a sensitive case, so to speak,"_ he struggled to explain. 

_"Guys, should we just...tell 'im?"_ Everyone went quiet at Zayn's proposal, making me further believe that Harry was indeed insane and that he's hiding from the authorities by having Zayn and Niall--

_"It's not my secret to tell,"_ Liam decided. Niall sighed.

_"Is it really our secret, either?"_ He justified. Zayn grumbled in frustration before letting out a sigh. 

_"Harry, baby, can hear me?"_ Zayn called softly. Harry hummed in acknowledgement, having gone back to bending my fingers every which way. 

_"Can you--do you feel safe, bubs?"_ Harry looked to me and flashed me a cute smile as I pulled into the driveway of my flat. 

"Lots a' safe! 'M with Loulou and he-he's takin' me places," he gushed cheerfully. 

_"Do you trust him, love?"_ Liam questioned as i stepped out of the car, handing the phone to Harry and walking around to his side of the car. Before opening his door, I gave him a few seconds to converse with everyone else on the phone. I proceeded to unbuckle him, listening in on the conversation. 

_"--wants to tell him, he should,"_ Zayn urged. 

_"But is he in the right mind-setting?"_ Niall worried. Liam assuages his worries with a simple sentence.

_"If Louis could babysit him while we went out and then form some type of bond, I believe he's trustworthy enough to tell. Plus, one day we'll need him to really be there for Harry under, um, certain circumstances,"_ he reasoned. Niall let out a deep breath. 

_"Okay, well, you tell 'im, Liam. I've had enough stress for the day."_ I heard Zayn offer Niall a back massage as I carried Harry into the flat. 

_"Alright, then. I'll talk to you both later,"_ Liam stated before Zayn and Niall promptly clicked off. I sat Harry on the couch in my living area, gently taking the phone from him. 

"Ready to spill the tea, Li?" I drawled sarcastically. Liam went silent for a moment as I wandered into the kitchen. 

_"I'll send you a link. Stay open-minded."_   ** _Call ended._**


	12. Chapter Eleven

**Louis's POV**

I waited a few minutes for Liam's link while doing little things to distract myself: tending to Harry's scraped knee, preparing him a sandwich (which I somehow managed to fuck up, until I finally resorted to ordering a half-mushroom, half-double cheese, pepperoni, and jalapeno pizza), and engaging in small talk with Harry. Finally, when my phone notified me of a text message, I abruptly ended my conversation with Harry, quickly unlocking my phone and clicking the iMessage icon. I faintly heard Harry amusing himself with my t.v. as I proceeded to click the link Liam had provided me with. 

**Liam:** https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=little

I waited quite impatiently as the link redirected me to safari. When I'd realized that it was an Urban Dictionary definition, I was immediately skeptical. I looked up to Harry as he laughed, seeing he was watching a cartoon, and sighed heavily; might as well see what's up with the lad. I read the definition:

  **Little**  

_A little is the submissive partner of a DDLG relationship often called names like baby girl and princess. They often act more childish than their real age (i.e., a 20 year old acting like a 4-5 year old). They often love coloring, stuffed animals, and watching cartoons. Depending on the age of the little, they may also require sippy cups and/or pacifiers. Just like there are daddy doms and little girls, there are also mommy dommes and little boys; and the same things apply to any combination of little and caregiver. They often require rules, such as bed time and punishments for being bad._

I read the definition over and over again, attempting to process what I was reading with what Liam recommended: an open mind. I glanced up at Harry once more; he was aimlessly looking around, occasionally poking his bandaged wound. I looked down at my phone again before sighing and standing up, rubbing my hands indecisively. Walking over to Harry, I quickly gathered his attention.

"Harry," I spoke. He smiled goofily. 

"Lou," he giggled. I couldn't help but crack a smile. This couldn't be too bad: he's just a baby--well, an adult baby. I shook my head to rid my mind of technicalities. 

"Where...are you?" I phrased stupidly. Harry blinked at me, causing me to blink in discomfort. "I mean--how...how  _old_ are you?" 

The question seemed to confuzzle him. I watched as he struggled to form words before huffing and pulling me close for a hug. His face was burrowed into my lower stomach, his breath hot against the fabric of my shirt. 

"Tired," he mumbled. I hesitantly patted his head as his arms fell back to his side. 

"Wanna sleep?" I nearly whispered, keeping my volume to a minimum. He nodded against my stomach and made grabby hands to me. I masked my initial surprise by cautiously picking him up and placing him on my hip. I wasn't too inexperienced in the field of caring for others: I'd grown up with too many sisters to count. I urged myself to place myself back in the scenario of caring for my little siblings. I carefully climbed up the stairs, carrying Harry bridal style, to my room. I felt him cuddle into me, pressing his face into the crook of my neck and a small smile dawned on my face. Maybe I could take on this role for another hour or so, I mean, how hard could it really--

"Wan' rara." I blinked at Harry, unsure of what he wanted but determined to find out. I set him down on my bed gently and slipped off his shoes. I struggled to shimmy him out of his tight skinnies because of his scraped knee. As the jeans came off I was surprised by what I was met with.

I was in utter shock. Harry failed to notice that my hands had paused on his thighs due to his eyes, which were hooded with exhaustion. I decided not to question it, completing the task with shaky hands. Once he would fully underdressed, I tucked him into my bed, staying with him until he dozed off peacefully. I then proceeded to creep out of the room, leaving for door open, and fled to the living room to converse with Liam. 

**Me:** _Okay explain._

I stared at my screen for a solid minute before the three dots of fate popped up. I sighed tiredly and checked the time:  _5:43 PM._ It was getting later into the evening. I began to wonder what I'd do with Harry.  _Would he wake up and suddenly feel like a teen? Would he still be a baby? DOES HE WANT MIL--_

**Lima Beans:** _where h @?_

Liam's lack of grammatical correctness will never cease to disappoint me. I shook my head and typed back a response. 

**Me:** _Sleep. Spill._

I turned off my phone and pocketed it, walking back to check on Harry. I peeked into the room to see him peacefully, curled into the fetus position. I nodded to myself and decided to stroll into the kitchen. Scavenging my fridge for suitable drink, settling on strawberry lemonade and pouring the beverage into a cup of my choice. I took a sizable gulp, sighing in content. I lazily sauntered into my living area, plopping down on my couch and propping my feet on my coffee table. I opened my phone to see I'd received a text or two from Liam. 

**Lima Beans:** _U should probz ask Z an N_

**Lima Beans:**   _Ill send u the #s_

**Me:**   _Omfg plz teXT LIKE AN EDUCATED BEING FFS_

**Lima Beans:**   _Hush b_

Before I had the chance to reply, Liam sent me two contacts, who'd I naturally assumed to be Zayn and Niall. I pocketed my phone, checking on Harry one more time before closing the bedroom door. I absentmindedly fiddled with various items of decor as I took my time strolling back into my living area.For some unknown reason, I felt jittery--nervous even. It felt as if I were meeting the parents. I snickered to myself as the clever mental remark.

Reluctantly, I sat back down on the couch, adjusting my clothing and hair. I decided to FaceTime the contact 'Irish Snowflake', so most definitely Niall. I took a deep breath anxiously as the call connected. Niall and Zayn popped up on my screen, both wearing sweatpants with their hair all messy and-- _wait._

"Did you two just  _fuck_?" Niall blushed, covering his face while Zayn just smirked, wiggling his eyebrows. 

"Yes," Zayn answered, throwing a wink my way. I rolled my eyes with a playful smile. 

"Where's my baby?" Niall asked, immediately cutting to the chase. 

"Sleeping," I replied vaguely, deciding against elaborating last minute. I didn't feel like beating the bush and delved right into the situation. 

"I have questions," I blurted before anyone could make anymore small talk. Zayn sigh tiredly, rubbing a hand across his face and limply flicked his other towards the camera.

"Might as well get it over with. Shoot." 

"So, like--how did---when...How?" I stammered, struggling to form a plausible question. 

"I guess we'll just start from the beginning," Niall proposed, clapping his hands together and taking a deep breath. "So, I guess this all started before we met Harry. We were caregivers and--wait, do you know what a caregiver is?" I thought back to the article Liam had previously sent me. The term 'caregiver' was mentioned but not explained. I shrugged wordlessly.

"Basically," Zayn started, "a caregiver is like the guardian of a little." Niall giggled. 

"We're the guardians of the littles," he laughed cheerfully. Zayn rolled his eyes and kissed his temple, wrapping an arm around his waist. I refrained from rolling my eyes and gently cleared my throat. 

"What next?" I prompted, bursting their affectionate bubble.

"Oh, right, of course--next! So, we weren't really looking for a little back then; we were too busy deciding whether or not we wanted to stick to monogamy or try polygamy. But we understood our status' as caregivers. It's funny how we met Harry, but we'll explain that later," Zayn spoke with a reminiscent grin. 

"Yeah, it was," Niall concurred, deciding to take over the storytelling. I leaned back against the couch, finding a comfortable position in which to listen to the seemingly long story. 

"But, we met Harry and we really didn't have any intention of indulging in a CG/L relationshi--"

"Wait, what's that?" I interrupted with brows furrowed in confusion. 

"It stands for caregiver slash little. So, like, yeah, basically," Zayn answered. I hummed and nodded, allowing them to finish their story.

"We had no intentions of that, but overtime, Zayn and I just started doing  _more_ for him. We'd drive him to and from school, walk him to his classes, bringing him breakfast in the mornings--soon, it became an out of school thing." 

"Yeah," Zayn overtook, "we began having him stay over at our place on weekdays and buying him stuff and just helping him out. That's when Niall and I sat down with each other and realized we were slowly making him more dependent on us without knowing it. We talked over our options and we both wanted him as our little." 

"So, we talked to him and, at first, he was completely against the idea," Niall told, ruffling his ear. I scratched my scruff in thought and interest as I was being informed, thinking back to the breakdown Harry had in the car.  _Had he dropped into the mindset of a little, back then?_

"We eventually convinced him to give us a sort of one-week trial," Zayn explained, "We got to do what we pleased, with his consent of course, and he would decided whether or not to go back to how things were before." 

"That's basically how it happened. Your friend Liam seemed to understand what lifestyle we were indulged in and he accepted us," Niall finished, both men making heart-eyes at the mention of Liam. I hummed, deep in thought.  _How does Liam know? Is this why I was asked to babysit? What do I do now?_

"So, there are things that trigger Harry's littlespace--"

"What?" I asked. 

"Littlespace," Niall repeated, "It's the mindset Harry goes into where he's carefree, responsibility-free, and a child. Basically." I nodded and took another sip of my strawberry lemonade. 

"Harry's little age can vary when he drops in littespace, but it usually ranges from newborn to about five-ish. To be honest, I haven't seem him at age five since we first introduced him to being little. I think he was mentally unprepared to become any younger at the time," Niall rambled to himself. Zayn smiled at him and rubbed his hands together. 

"So, that's that. There are things that can trigger his inner little, like affection, fear, anxiety or depression, and so on. I'm sort of like his dad in a sense and Niall's more like the mummy," Zayn grinned, ruffling Niall's hair. Niall whined and playfully smacked his hand away. I laughed at their small banter. 

"Okay, so what's a 'rara'?" I decided to ask, the question suddenly coming to mind. 

"Oh! That's his rattle," Niall answered, his facial expression immediately turning to one of worry. "Did he ask for it? Oh, dear, he probably misses it...Wait! He doesn't have any supplies! He's asleep, you say?" I nodded in confirmation. 

"Wake him up gently," Zayn instructed, getting up and moving out of frame. "We don't know what age he is, but if he's asking for his rara, he's probably about one or two." I nodded, getting up and taking my phone with me so I could still listen to them. 

"How's he been talking?" Niall queried. I thought back to our small conversation when he was awake. 

"One-word sentences, I believe. I tried to ask how old he was but he couldn't answer and just said 'tired'," I explained to my best ability as I quickly neared my bedroom. I slowly opened the door and crept in. I hushed them for a moment, muting myself as I lowered myself to Harry's side. 

He looked like a pure angel sleeping, his hair fanned out on the pillow beneath his head as he curled deeper into his fetal position. I refrained from cooing. I questioned how I had nearly began tormenting him a while ago; he was such an angel and I didn't even know him that well. It had indeed been an off day for me and he just looked so content with his life that it disgusted me. 

I rid my mind of such thoughts and turned my focus back on waking Harry up. I gently shook his side.  _Nothing._ I shook a little harder, but all that managed was a quiet whine. I snorted softly.

"Harry," I whisper-yelled. I saw his face scrunch up in confusion as he cuddled deeper into the pillow he had. I carefully pried it from his hands and slowly drew back the blanket. 

"Nooooo," Harry whined, his hands blinding struggling to search for the warmth and comfort that was being stripped from him. 

"You have to wake up, H," I commanded softly. He sighed and sat up with a pout, eyes still closed as he groaned grumpily. 

"Don't wanna." I refrained from cooing at the surprisingly adorable stubbornness of his, but resorted to putting my foot down. 

"How old are you?" I asked while I grabbed my phone, looking to see Zayn and Niall equipped with what seemed to be a baby bag and fully clothed. They seemed to be waiting for permission to speak. I gestured for them to wait another minute discreetly while I listened to Harry's answer. 

"F-five," he mumbled sleepily as he rubbed one of his eyes with the back of his hand. I looked at him in confusion. Niall had said he hadn't been five since his first drop. I nodded silently and turned off mute on my phone.

"Here's Zayn and Niall," I stated, passing my phone over to a very excited Harry.

"Harebear!" Niall gasped.

"Bubba!" Zayn cooed. Harry giggled, a faint red tint rising to his cheeks. 

"Hi!" Harry squealed, waving at the phone.

"How's our little boy?" Harry blushed, shooting a quick embarrassed glance my way before childishly averting his eyes. 

"Ni!" he whined, covering his face with one of his hands. "'M a big boy," he muttered. I heard Niall giggle a bit. 

"Of course, darling. My deepest apologies," he mocked playfully, causing Harry to laugh lightly. 

"Do you want Mummy and Zee to come over, love?" Zayn crooned. I struggled not to show any grimace or confusion at the word 'Mummy'. Was that an official thing or just something that gave Niall a sense of pride? Was this something Zayn and Niall took to the bedroom? Did I want to know the answer??

"Wanna stay with Lou!!" Harry exclaimed, smiling brightly at me. I chuckled and ruffled his hair.

"I don't mind a little company," I agreed, "Plus, it'd help me get used to...all  _this_ ," I supported, vaguely gesturing to Harry who was mesmerized by the quick motion of my hands. He quietly took one of my hands between both of his and started playing with my fingers again. 

"You sure it's alright?" Niall fretted, "We already have the bab--big boy bag packed and everything. We could throw on some t-shirts and be there in fi--"

"There's no need. I've got this."

"Are you sure you're okay with everything?" Zayn hesitated. I nodded giving a thumbs up with my free hand. 

"Okay, then. If you're su--HARRY NO!" Niall reprimanded mid-sentence. I widened my eyes as I felt my thumb being encased by a wet and warm sensation. I look down to Harry who;s blushing with my thumb between his lips. 

"Okay, well, I'll call you later with an update. See ya guys soon," I bid my farewells before hastily ending the call. I carefully tugged my digit from Harry's mouth, leaving me with a pouty boy.

"Love, my hands could be dirty. We don't want you getting sick, do we?" I warned softly. He just huffed and crossed his arms across his chest indignantly. 

"I wan' my dummy," he demanded. I raised an eyebrow towards him. 

This was going to be an interesting evening. 

 


	13. Chapter Twelve

**( Harry's POV)**

I looked up at Lou with a determined glint in my eyes. I  _wanted_ my dummy, therefore I would  _get_ it. 

"I don't have one for you, pumpkin," Louis leveled my gaze with an equally determined one. "Want something to eat, instead?" I narrowed my eyes at his offer.

"No," I declined stubbornly. I stood up from the bed and walked over to him, getting up in his face until we were nose to nose. He blushed.  

"Harry?"

With no further warning or indication, I jumped into his arms, causing him to lose balance and fall back, Lucky for me, my landing was cushioned. Louis groaned beneath me. 

"Get off," he wheezed. I glared at him

"Where's my dummy?" 

"I don't have one!" I moaned unhappily before rolling off his torso and gently face-planting the floor. I whined miserably. I felt Louis's foot cautiously nudge my side. 

"H, you need to get up so we can get you some food." I grunted. A moment passed by before he sighed. "If you get up, I'll buy you any toy you want." I hopped up with a squeal, quickly going to nuzzle my face into his tummy. Louis laughed and ruffled my hair.

"Let's go, you wild child."

***

A beep of a car sounded outside of my window. I looked out to see a a stranger yelling at someone in the lane across from him. I watched on in curiosity as the other driver drove off. The light turned green and the driver seemed to sigh. Before the driver could drive away, he caught me blatantly staring and flipping me off. Next thing I know, the man is driving away and I'm in my feelings. 

I bit my lip to conceal my whimpers of emotional pain as I pouted at the window. Did I do something wrong? Was he mad at me?

_"Harreh."_ I jumped as I felt a hand gently on my arm. I glanced up to see Louis looking down at me with a concerned look--No, a  _daddy_ look.

"Hey, you alright, little one?"  _Little one._  I internally preened. I smiled widely at him.

"Hi, Lou," I greeted. He gave me a confused by amused grin.

"I asked if you were alright, love. Are you sick or summat?" he joked with a serious undertone. I shook my head.

"Feel okay. Light," I described, struggling for words. Louis seemed to understand, nonetheless.

"You want me to run in and grab you a...a  _'rara'_? I could also grab another dummy, as well. I could buy you whatever you want," he rambled, his hands moving animatedly. I watched them, as I always did when he moved him, the sudden movements captivating my short-lived attention. 

"Yeah," I nearly whispered, only catching short phrases. It seemed my mind didn't really desire to speak with him. In fact, I didn't feel like saying anything at all. Sudden bursts of giddiness flowed through me and I just couldn't stop the big grin that teetered its way onto my face, all thoughts of the previous anguish forgotten almost completely. 

"Let's go, bubs," Louis huffed out as he struggled to reach over and unbuckle me. As he finished his task, he held out a hand for me, something I gratefully accepted as I gracelessly. I kept a tight grip on his upper bicep as we entered the store. I didn't pay attention to anything seemingly irrelevant, searching for three things and three things only: a rattle, a dummy, and toys.  _Lots_ of toys.

Once we passed through the automatic doors, I gazed around in awe while Lou gently tugged me along. I tried not to think about the how his hand had firmly been placed atop of mine, which was still on his arm. I managed a light blush before my short attention span had been drawn away by the baby aisle.

I practically dragged Louis there, very much excited and impatient.

Louis snorted but I ignored him, pausing in front of a rack of pacis. Louis and I glanced over to one another briefly before staring at the rack again.

"So...?" Louis prompted, looking at me for further instruction. I frowned, not particularly liking the idea that I'd have to take the reigns but understanding nonetheless.

"We have to find a rara first," I promoted, vaguely gesturing to the next aisle. Louis nodded and made a beeline towards the aisle. I fastened my grip on his pinky, maintaining speed but somehow still behind, as I tripped over my two left feet. We finally stopped in front of a rack of rattles.

"You can pick one," Louis allowed. I pouted, pulling puppy dog eyes on him.

"Pretty please?" I whined, nuzzling my face in his neck as he turned to avoid my gaze.

"Jesus Christ," he muttered as his face heated up. He let out a resigned sigh.

"Fine, fine. But only two!" I hummed happily, completely abandoning him in favour of the rattles. I reach my hand out to skim the plethora of rattles, varying in size, shape, colour, and texture. I stopped at a particularly soft one.

  
It was a wrist rattle, something my little mind couldn't comprehend at that moment. Nonetheless, I was still mesmerised as I shook it, the light jingle of bells ringing out as I did so. I smiled to myself, giggling as I indulged myself in the fun activity. I turned to show it to Louis.

"What do you think?"I queried cheerfully. Louis's countenance was overcome with the strong look of fond.

"Adorable, love," he complimented. He thought for a moment as I just stared at him like a clueless puppy. "I'm gonna go fetch us the basket. Stay here, yeah?" I answered him with a bright smile and a nod, turning back to the rattles to search for a second one.

I'd been looking over my options for about two minutes since Louis's departure when a man pushing a basket strolled down and paused a few feet behind me. I have the man nothing but a quick side glance before resuming my amusement.

"Look in' for the little one, eh?" The man chuckled as he sauntered over and stood next to me. A small, fleeting beat a panic hit me as I widened my eyes and blush, quietly nodding before hesitantly playing with a rattle for comfort.

"Yeah," the man sighed nostalgically, " I remember when my daughter was into rattles. She's more interested in teethers, now. (Plant-kin) How's your kid, eh? How old!" he rambled. I cleared my throat and smile politely, discreetly beginning to search for Louis.

"'M three," I mumbled, feeling myself slip a little more due to my discomfort and mild panic.

"Hm? Couldn't quite hear you there, mate," the man chuckle, unintentionally ridiculing me.

"Um, I'm—"

"Hey, princess, I got the b—?" I turned to find Louis mid-step and blushing as he stammered, struggling to recollect himself.

"Harry, who's this?" Louis questioned in a bit of a squeaky pitch, most likely still recovering from his initial embarrassment. Instead of providing a plausible answer, I merely shrugged, setting the random rattle down to shrink behind Lou.

"Hello, mate! The name's Nick. 'Can call me Grimmy, though—my last name," Nick introduced, holding out his hand to Louis enthusiastically as Louis slyly slid his hand back to wind around my mid-back and gently push me forward so that my front was pressed flush against his back. I shrunk myself behind his back as he tightened his arm around me protectively.

"My name's Louis. Louis Tomlinson," Louis replies, taking Nick's hand in his for a firm shake.

"Your mate and I were just talking about our kids! You have any little ones?" Nick queried excitedly. Louis glances back at me with an unreadable expression before slowly nodding and turning back to the man with the cart.

"He's four," he elaborated with a humorous hint in his voice.

"Three," I mumbled into the back of his neck, absentmindedly mouthing at the skin of the back of his neck in boredom.

"Three. He's three," Louis corrected. Nick nodded, humming in interest.

"My daughter's only a year. She's quite the handful, but I love her very dearly. I mean, technically, she's my goddaughter, but my best friend and I go way back, like back to—"

"I'm afraid I'll have to cut things short," Louis interrupted with a quick clap of his hands. "But we're runnin' a bit late. Right, love?" Louis turned to me for confirmation as I blushed, offering a meek nod.

"No worries, no worries! Don't let me get in ya way, mate," Nick joked, holding his hands up playfully. "Have a nice day!" And with that, Louis proceeded to guide me far away from the rattles.

"Might wanna hurry this venture up, yeah?"

***

We ended up leaving the store with two dummies ( that Niall would alter for me when I got back home), for stuffies, five toys, and two more rattles. I cuddle close to Louis as he patiently waited in the checkout line, bathing him and affection as he groaned on and on about his now empty wallet.

"You're a  _very_  expensive child," he joked as he strapped my seatbelt and went to put my new items in the trunk. "Me wallet's nearly empty! You're quite lucky my family is tapped into a small pool of wealth or we'd all be royally f— _screwed,_ " Lou rambled, stuttering on his nearly-curse word. I smiled at him when he entered the car to signify my appreciation for his efforts. He seemed to understand nonetheless, sticking out the index finger of the hand off the wheel for me to twiddle with as he began driving down the main road. I, of course, gladly accepted and twiddled all the way home.

_Home_.

When we'd settled into the house, the bags of all our little things on the dining table, Louis's phone rang. He looked at the caller ID and pouted as I curled into his lap.

"Oi, oi," Louis greeted as he began threading his free hand through my hair. I practically purred under all the attention.

"Yeah, yeah... No, he's fine. No, yeah, we just got back, actually. Went on a little shopping spree of sorts and..."

I slowly put myself drifting off, the initial excitement and physical demand of the day hitting me all at once. I was unsure of how much time had passed but, just as I was about to fall into a deep slumber, I felt myself being heaved up into someone's arms, a quiet grunt leaving the lifter's mouth.

I accommodated myself to the person's comfort, laying my head on their shoulder and wrapping my legs around their waist. Next thing I know, I feel the fleeting sensation of a gentle fall. I crack an eye open to see Louis shimmying me out of my jeans. I lazily assisted and limply raised my arms over my head so that he could take my shirt off. Once he'd completed the not-so-simple tasks, he switched into some sweats and joined me in the bed.

I hummed appreciatively and laid on top of him, settling myself on his chest so that I could hear his heartbeat. I frowned, feeling that I wasn't close enough to him. I sat up and tugged on Louis's shirt. Ignoring his look of confusion, I clumsily began pulling it over his head.

"Steady there, love! I got it," he offered softly, removing his shirt himself. I immediately resumed position, happily basking in the skin to skin contact. After a short while, Louis's arms wounded themselves around my waist loosely. I took his arms and firmly tightened them, letting go as Louis got the hint.

With that, I closed my eyes and let exhaustion do its thing.

 


	14. Chapter Thirteen

**(Louis's POV)**

I looked down at Harry's sleeping figure on my chest and internally cooed; his mouth was slightly open, a small puddle of drool collecting on my chest. I didn't mind too much, as surprising as it seemed. I didn't want to disturb him, but Niall and Zayn were on their way to pick him up. They'd been all but too eager to have Harry back in their possession. Slowly, I began to roll him off of me-- gently, of course. As I settled him down, I carefully rose off of the bed and made my way to my laundry room to take his clothes out of the dryer wear they had resided for the majority of the day. I gently folded the adorable articles of clothing before fishing a reusable grocery bag from under my kitchen sink. 

As I packed away everything 'Harry', I periodically checked up on the said boy. He seemed so peaceful sleeping, only tossing and turning for a moment. Of course, I began to stress over this (but if anyone were to ask me, I'd deny it) and went over to the edge of the bed and carded my fingers through his hair until he calmed and quietly searched my closet for a childhood teddy I had a feeling he'd like. 

I set everything that belonged to him down on the dining table and checked my phone to see I had a text from Niall telling me he was to arrive within five minutes. I nodded to myself, glancing at the time in which the text was sent and the current time, and did the mental math. I had about two to three minutes to wake Harry up and get him ready to leave. I made my way to the room, scanning the area for miscellaneous items to be later cleaned up. I slowly cracked the door open to avoid any creaking and went to gently shake Harry awake.

"Harry," I whispered as his eyebrows furrowed. His drowsy state caused him to be disoriented and he cuddled deeper into the giant bear. I refrained from pinching his cheeks. He just looked so  _cute._ I shook my head at the thought; Harry was changing me and I didn't know how to feel about it. 

"Harry, bubs, wake up. Niall's on his way--" 

" _Ni_ ," Harry exclaimed, sitting up quickly before cupping his forehead a bit, going slightly cross-eyed. 

"Woozy," he muttered to himself as I rushed to his aid. 

"Careful," I chastised, scolding him gently. He blushed and managed a small smile. "And yes, him and Zayn are almost here, lovely. We've got to get you at least halfway decent," I joked, a feeling of pride overcoming me as he let out a precious giggle. 

Harry wordlessly raised his arms, making grabby hands towards me. I lifted him up onto my hip and led him to my closet. I checked my phone one more time before proceeding to quickly dress him in what we both found fit. As I was slipping socks and boots on his dainty feet (for a tol boi), my phone began ringing. Without looking, I already had a clue of who it was.

"Time to go, princess," I singsonged, tapping his love handles as he leaned against me, the both of us making our way to the door. Of course, I stopped by the kitchen and grabbed his bag of clothes and toys before slipping on some vans and exiting my front door. At this point in time, I'd already answered the call and made idle chat with Niall as we neared their van.

"Bubba!!" Niall exclaimed as he hopped out the car to embraced Harry. Zayn put the car in park and followed Ni's lead. I looked down at my phone, feeling as if I were an intruder to an exclusive moment, and wondered where Liam was today--tonight, more like it. 

"Thanks for handling him today, mate. Means a lot," Zayn thanked, startling me as he gathered me in his arms. It took my brain a moment to command my limbs to return the favour, a newfound bond of trust forming. He released me with a pat and my eyes were immediately drawn to Harry. 

He seemed to be struggling against Niall as he tried to strap Harry into his car seat before catching my gaze and beckoning me over. I muttered a quick excuse of leave to Zayn and made my way over to Harry. As soon as I came within arms-length of him, he coddled me in a bear hug. 

"I don't wanna leave," he pouted into the crook of my neck. I cooed rubbing his back before pulling away slowly and buckling him in. I failed to notice Niall and Zayn watching from the sidelines, giving us time for a private departure. 

"You'll hear from me soon enough, love," I soothed, kissing his forehead instinctively. "Remember to text me when you get big, yeah?" Harry nodded, giving me a toothy smile paired with a cute thumbs up. I put my thumb up and touched the pads of our thumbs together. 

"Bye bye," he mumbled as Zayn and Niall made their way over and secured themselves in the car. I merely smiled as I closed the side door, waving  at Harry and nodding in a  sophisticated manner to the other two.

Then I was free to be alone.  _Yay._

**(Harry's POV)**

I must've fallen asleep again during the car ride home because I woke up in my big room. I scrunched up my nose in mild distaste before sitting up and rubbing my eyes of weariness. I vaguely took not of my outfit: a simple silk lavender nightgown and no underwear. Looking over to my bedside table, I see my phone and a note sloppily written in what suspiciously looked like Niall's handwriting.

I skimmed the inscription, understanding that they were to be out and I had to be big for school tomorrow. I sighed before setting the note down and unlocking my phone to check through my notifications. Scrolling through them, I see Louis's name and immediately click my screen. Our messages pop up.

 **Louboo** : Thought you'd forget to txt me so I texted first lolz

 **Louboo** : Rest well love ❤️

My heart melted at such a sweet gesture and I immediately shot him a reply.

 **Haz** 👌: Hi hiiiiiii!! ❤️

I blushed and hit the send arrow quickly before I could chicken out of a basic conversation with Louis. I wanted about five minutes, mindlessly jumping from one app to the next with still no response, before giving up to drag myself out of bed and scavenge for a healthy snack.

There was a slight spring in my step, very minuscule but there nonetheless. I stopped by the bathroom and sat down for a wee when an unwanted memory flooded the gates of my mind.

_"Harry, can we talk?" Gemma queried through the bathroom door with a gentle rap. She'd accidentally walked in on me using the bathroom, but I wasn't as affected as she was; I was very open with my body as a child. I muttered a yes and finished doing my business. I cautiously opened the door to see the hunched over figure of my sister.  She took one glance at me and gripped me by my forearm, leading me to her room. Once we'd reached the said destination, she closed and locked the door behind us._

_"Sit," she commanded, pointing to the edge of her bed. I obeyed without question. She looked at me and sighed, running a hand through her hair._

_"So," Gemma began slowly as I looked up at her expectantly._   _"Um, I know this is going to sound_ _a bit...different, but you have to--you've got to like **stand**." I gave her an odd stare as I slowly did as she had said. She sighed out in annoyance. _

_"No, not now! But like, when you use the loo. It's what boys do," she elaborated._

_"Why?" I queried as I sat down once more._

_"Because. Sitting is for ladies," she answered crossing her arms across her chest._

_And I just didn't know what to do with that information._

The memory ended just as quickly as it had come. I let out a little sigh; Gemma and I were as close as ever, but there was a time where she was subject to secondhand homophobia. She was wired to believe deeply in gender roles and the whole "Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve" spiel. I can't help but be reminded by the little things of who she used t o be under the heavy influence of our not-so-motherly mother. I quickly washed my hands and completed my journey to the kitchen for a 90-calorie Quaker's granola bar--the one with the chocolate drizzle. I sighed in content.

"I  _love_ granola bars," I muttered to myself, closing my eyes and focusing on my happiness. I shook off the earlier fleeting moment of nostalgic sadness and listened to the birds chirping and the wind--my phone chimed.

I immediately fished my phone from my back pocket, completely forgetting my five seconds of zen, and clicked into my messages. 

 **Louboo:** I see princess has awakened lol xx

 **Hazz:**  Stahhpppp 

 **Louboo:** Lol what're you up to? 

I lazily allowed myself to numb-mindedly lead myself to my big room, nibbling on my tasty granola bar. 

 **Haz:** Nm just eating a granola bar

 **Louboo:** Hey hey 

 **Haz:** What lmao

 **Louboo:** Look

I clicked out of our messages and started a YouTube video as I waited for Louis to amuse me with a meme or something. I didn't have to wait too long, apparently, because about thirty seconds into my video, I get a FaceTime call from the man himself. I quickly looked down at my attire, checking to see if I'm presentable. Deeming myself pretty okay, I answered the call with a bright smile. 

"Hi, Lou!" I greeted excitedly, granola bar still in grip (I love this goddamn granola bar), waving a sweater paw at him. He cooed, causing a faint blush to taint my cheeks. 

"Hi, mate," he greeted softly, looking a bit tired himself, "Sorry for the short wait. Had to wee. How're you feeling?" 

"Big," I deadpanned with a distasteful scrunch of the nose. Louis snorted, slightly shaking his head. 

"I'm assuming that's bad," he mused with a curious undertone added. I decided to amuse his interest. 

"No particularly," I worded slowly, "It's more of an inner struggle overall. I have to get into the necessary mind set to function like a...well, like a big person. I'm just a little foggy in my headspace. The little in me wants to stay little, but I know better and understand why I have to get there," I further explained. I watched with a giggle as Louis pursed his lips together comically, humming loudly. After a small pause, he nodded.

"Valid point you've got there," he spoke in a playfully mocking manner. A peaceful silence fell over the two of us as we made short-lived eye contact on various occasions, causing me to continuously blush and turn away. I made time to take small bites of my granola bar as to not to break the peace. The moment itself wasn't awkward but  _I_ was. 

"You've changed a bit," I pointed out nonchalantly, slowly shifting my gaze to a misplaced teddy.  _How'd that get in the big room?_

"What d'you mean?" Louis responded as I rose from the bed to retrieve the miscellaneous Mr. Cuddlekins. 

"There's been a lot of development in your character over such a short amount of time," I mumbled as I bent down to grab him, granola bar and phone in one hand. 

"What?"

"I said you've become a better version of yourself." Louis took on silence almost thoughfully as if planning to continue the conversation, but sadly, I got distracted with a brilliant idea.

"OH! Wait, do you wanna see my little room?" I proposed excitedly. Louis giggled at my outburst. 

"Sure, love," he answered. I tried not to blush at the mere pet name.

"I want you to come over, Lou. And then we can go shopping! Or look at stuff through windows because I'm broke and then eat at the food court," I rambled excitedly as I tossed Mr. Cuddlekins carelessly into my little room.

" As fun as that sounds, I'm spending the day with Li. We're gonna...do some things and then Zayn's coming over--"

"Zayn?" I interrupted in mild confusion.

"--so we can blaze up a bit," Louis finished. I furrowed my eyebrows, having been lost a while ago.

"Zayn? Blazing? What?" Louis chuckled.

"Zayn and I have common interests I guess. He texted me a while ago," he explained as I settled myself on the bed in the big room. I finally laid down and looked at my phone to see Louis's blue eyes already staring at me, unashamed of doing so. 

"Okay, but what's blazing?" I questioned. Louis raised his eyebrows in surprise. 

"I'm assuming I'm  _not_ supposed to tell you that one, mate," Louis worded cautiously; and before I could say anything else, there was a resounding ringing on Louis's end of the call.

"That's probably Liam. I gotta go." I pouted but understood.

"Okay. Text me!" Louis giggled and winked before his face disappeared from my screen. I sighed.

"Well, time to be lonely."


	15. Chapter Fourteen

** (Louis's POV) **

"I can't believe you talked me into this,"  I grumbled as Liam and I sneaked into the back of the house. Liam sighed for the second time in the past five minutes.

"Look, it's an easy way to make money. Plus, were you really gonna 'walk the fridge'? That's the lamest excuse I've  _ever_ heard," he rebutted. I slowly closed the slide door behind us and put the cover over my face. 

Liam began fanning himself, huffing out a breath of overheating. 

"This goddamn outfit is too hot," he complained. I mimicked him behind his back as we hid in the kitchen. He sensed my foolery and slapped the back of my head. I hissed and cursed quietly under my breath as we awaited the arrival of the kids and  the verbal cue. What felt like ten minutes passed by lethargically until, finally, we heard the front door being unlocked. Almost immediately, the once quiet room was filled with the noisy din of children's shoes pitter-pattering about and the shrill shriek of excited children. 

"Okay, Freddie, remember how you told mummy you love Batman and Spiderman?" the birthday boy's mum spoke aloud as the children began to settle down in curiosity. 

"Yeah," the child responded. 

"Well.." That was our cue. Liam and I simultaneously popped out from behind the kitchen counter, striking heroic poses. The kids broke out into screams of awe and fanatic wonder. We braced ourselves as hoards of stubby fingers pinched at our outfits. I knew that it'd be a long two and a half hours from there.

 

***

I sunk into the couch as I removed my mask and unzipped the back of my suit. I needed a shower. Closing my eyes for a quick minute, I reminisced my time spent with Harry merely the day before. It was way better than wasting time with kids with stubby fingers who keep asking questions.  _Much_ better. 

I pulled out my phone and checked my notifications, seeing two texts from Harry and one from Zayn, telling me he was on his way. I clicked the notification from Harry to check up on him. 

 **Hazz:** Hope ur having fun with Liam!

 **Hazz:** Call me when u can?

I smiled absentmindedly before quickly typing a response to his text from nearly half an hour ago.

 **Louboo:** Yeah I'll call after Zayn visits x

With that I tucked my phone away and wandered upstairs lethargically, heading towards the bathroom for a shower. About an hour later ('cause, yes, I need to make sure every manly fiber of my being is clean),  I wrapped a towel right above my navel and ran a hand through the wet locks of hair that were dripping water into my eyes in a bothersome manner.

I exited the bathroom to hear frantic knocking at my door. I furrowed my eyebrows in urgent confusion and yelled a quick 'wait' before toweling myself down and throwing on a pair of sweats. I swiftly clambered down the steps of my stairs and jogged over to my door. I unlocked and opened the door to see a slightly disheveled Zayn.

"Oh," I said after a small pause, "hi." Zayn shook his head breathlessly with a small grin on his face before entering my house. I scoffed playfully and rolled my eyes, closing my door and locking it.

I hollered at Zayn, who'd made himself beyond comfortable on my couch, that I'd take a quick minute to make myself decent in the slightest. I threw on a pair of joggers and a beanie, completely forgoing a shirt, and made my way back to the living area; Zayn seemed to already be rolling the joints.

"So, when did you start smoking?" I asked conversationally, accepting the spliff graciously.  I slid a lighter his way as he began answering.

"Sometime a year or two ago--sophomore year, I believe." Zayn sighed. "I was going through some things with Niall because there was this girl I wanted to invite into our relationship and he wasn't quite fond of her. It was our first fight," he explained softly. I listened intently as the lighter made its way back in my possession.

"Why the commotion? Did she not like Niall?" I inquired as I took the first hit of the night, feeling myself settling into the couch.

"She said she did, but I don't think she meant it," he shrugged, "I think she was just trying to get close to me, something that obviously had Niall feeling some type of way. Of course, I was oblivious to this and one night, Niall and I got into this huge night where he made me choose--"

"Who did you choose?" I interrupted. Zayn raised an eyebrow curiously at my sudden interest but I was simply a nosy person with a not-so-interesting life.

"That was the problem," he began as he inhaled his drug, "I didn't want to. So, there was some yelling and some slammed doors and next thing I knew, I was at some bar getting wasted when something offered me weed. I thought 'what the heck', and gave it a go." Zayn exhaled after another hit.

"And here you are today," I concluded for him humourously, lightening the mood. He chuckled.

"And here we are."

***

"CHICKEN AND CHILIIIIIIII!!!!" I giggled as Zayn started doing the Macarena to 'Single Ladies' by Beyonce. 

"Zayn, what the FUCK!" I hollered, beginning to look for my phone. What fucking time was it? I'd finally found it on the coffee table, the thing I'd been staring at for about 15 minutes, naturally. I squinted as letters swam around my lock screen. I could vaguely make out Harry's name and I felt myself smile unconsciously at the thought of him and before I knew it, I was directing Siri (politely, of course, 'cause god knows what she's capable of) to call 'Hazz'. She complied in her odd, robotic voice and Zayn doubled over in laughter, which caused me to laugh over nothing.

"'Ello?"

"HARREH!! Hi," I drawled out, heaving myself off the couch and making my way to my room with a quick dismissive hand gesture in Zayn's general direction. 

"Louis?" Harry muttered through the phone. I hummed in acknowledgement as I closed the door to my bedroom, the bass to a random Beyonce song thumping through the walls gently.

"Hey, Haz--god, what day is it?" I mumbled to myself as I through myself on the bed. I'm too high for this shit.

"Are you okay, Lou?" he asked with genuine concern. I nodded although he couldn't see me.

"Couldn't feel better, love! I'm, like, flying right now. Soaring, buzzing--BEES!!" I exclaimed, proud of my connection as I made a buzzing sound. Harry giggled, inflaming a sense of pride in me.

"You're so silly, Lou," he commented softly, seeming weary. I frowned.

"Are you sleeping, love?" I asked as I circled my belly button. Belly button...how do you say that in french? Is it something everyone learns to say in America? Who came up with the words 'belly' and 'button'? WHY ARE THERE SO MANY DIFFERENT WAYS TO REFER TO THE ABDOMEN??? There's belly, stomach, tummy, tum tums--wait, isn't that like a vitamin? Or a medicine? Shit, I hope Zayn isn't fucking up my coffee table...

"--late, Lou. I'm tons tired and yeah..." Harry began to mumble sleepily. I nodded as if I were listening.

"Yes, I agree," I replied all business-like and whatnot. "Do you like weed?"

"What?"

"Weed," I repeated, "the little green stuff you put in a paper and light on fire before inhaling said fire. It's like doing a magic trick," I mused.

"Louis, what are you talking about?" Harry sighed through the phone, more shifting being prominently heard.

"Zayn and I are doing weeeeeeeeeeeeed, Harry. HAPPY DAYS!!" I chuckled as I began rolling in my bed. Abruptly, a crash sounded from downstairs and I jumped, landing on the floor; I groaned in pain and annoyance.

"I'll have to call you back, Haz, I think Zayn broke my fish. Bye!"


End file.
